Hail to the cream | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 05/14/22(Sat)01:21:45 No.68618878 DQ >Here Anon, I got you vanilla >l'm so glad that I get to go out for ice cream with my favorite grandson 1.03 MB JPG : Anonymous 05/14/22(Sat)01:24:44 No.68618907 Of course, Mr President. The cabinet meeting will begin in 20 minutes. : Anonymous 05/14/22(Sat)01:35:08 No.68618999 >>68618878 (OP) # i wanted chocolate chocolate chip you old f---

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon is feared | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/14/22(Sat)12:52:14 No.68624305 >boss yells at me at work >mom yells at me at home >dogs bark at me on the street >me go to the kindergarten and yell at kids >they scream and run away I'm still feared 31 KB JPG

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Anon doesn’t want to date a dog | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/14/22(Sat)10:22:09 No.878129533 >be me >be on dating website >every once in a while I run into someone who owns a pit bull How can I tell? >there's always more photos of their dog on their dating website than them 10 KB JPG >they're always moderately obese Why the f--- do women do this? I'm trying to date you not you're f------ dog. View Thread

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Once upon a time | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/13/21(Tue)18:57:06 No.858954461 >be born female >be genderfluid >have sex with straight male >switch to male in the middle of sex >bitch is gay now Imao owned 33 KB JPG

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Gas station | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/13/22(Fri)18:06:34 No.53549143 13398750249575.jpg 557 KB JPG >Lewis-cooled AR Not a bad idea, especially with an FRT. : Anonymous 05/13/22(Fri)18:07:27 No.53549153 *farts in your thread* Nothing personal, kid. >>53549498 #

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Anon loses all hope in humanity | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/03/18(Wed)00:13:01 No.781354558 Hey f--- heres a greentext threat about Irony >be me >have female friend who likes shitpost as much as I do 15 KB JPG >notificationtojoinashitpostgroupfromher.exe >Flat Earth etc... >seems like a decent shitpost group >everyone has a top tier shitposting/Irony humor >"NASA uses Eyefish lence" >Laugh at funny ironical memes and s--- they write >my friend likes NASA and space bs >see a post where she is arguing w/ some random guy >Find out the FB group is not a shitpost group >Mfw I've been in this group for at least 2 months >Mfw I thought their posts were memes >Mfw these people actually think Earth is flat >Mfw top excuse is "NASA uses eyefish lence"

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Anon has a date | /r/Greentext

SADFROGS 59D5CDE9-5F63-42BE-85E2-4B0A78C7B6DF.jpg 55 KB JPG >college >walking to class >guy comes up to me >hands me candy and says happy valentines day >continues on with his day wishing everyone he sees a happy valentines day and giving them candy Honestly day made

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Anon is smarter than the average american | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/04/22(Wed)18:58:09 No.877499651 >Seen IKEA difficult assembly memes >Order several pieces of furniture over three weeks. >No missing pieces >No confusing assembly, no troubles assembling what so ever. 66 KB JPG Are Americans just retarded? Cim

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Anon dislikes Ronald Reagan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: (hoHpU9ij ) Reagan sucked ass 05/14/22(Sat)00:43:12 No.377537770 >be Ronald Reagan >fund the Contras who ran paramilitary death squads in Nicaragua >turn a blind eye to them smuggling some cocaine into the U.S 25 KB JPG >enact harsh penalties for people who started using crack cocaine that the CIA-backed guys were bringing in >(poor blacks in urban areas were disproportionately targeted by these laws) >don't do s--- about AIDS when it became an issue around 1982, and don't even mention AIDS publicly until 1985 >do Reaganomics which f----- over a lot of poor Americans >give a bunch of money and weapons to Mujahideen fighters in Afghanistan, who would later help create the Taliban & other terrorist groups >he also may or may not have had Alzheimer's while he was still in office >still win both elections in a landslide, & manage to be one of the most popular Presidents ever

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Anon’s friend is a pain in the neck | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/05/13(Tue)20:50:44 No.514564416 >Be in 7th >Friend can crack his neck real loud and can turn his head completely sideways >Have a sub during choir >We think it would be funny if he made it look like he snapped his own neck >In between songs he screams out "I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!" >Proceeds to make the loudest crack ive ever heard >Falls to the ground >The sub screams and runs out the door >lols were had He then hid in a storage closet and was suspended

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Anone almost tells person to have a seat | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 8/29/2019 (Thu)09:19:45 No.852672830 > Be me circa 2008 (forgettable year) > be 14 yo girl at the time > friends and I are bored watching Dateline NBC wat >getidea.ogg 9 KB JPG >decide to go into chatrooms to lure in old creepy guys who want underrage girls >ffw to one week after when friend's parents aren't home >lure a 55 year old man to our house >forgot to mention that friend's dad owns a small print shop >print out life sized cardboard cut out of Chris Hansen and leave in the doorway >Old dude opens the door and f------ gets scared shitless and sprints away >mwf i realize how absolutely f------ stupid we were and how we could have been murdered or worse r----

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warning: idiots in commentsAnon does his PhD | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/30/18(Fri)21:43:18 No.10178727 >be G >doing a PhD >one day a trans girl student from one of my classes comes to my office >says she wants to work with me and my PhD supervisor as an 5 KB JPG undergrad >ask her some questions to gauge her level >pretty keen and capable, good >ask her to prove that the fundamental group of the quotient space X/G is G itself if its action on the simply connected space X is free and transitive >she freezes up >ok, ask her instead to prove that two curves on a manifold have trivial tangent spaces at a point iff they intersect transversally >her face flushes red, as if she's on the brink of tears >uh oh, let's try something easier >ask her to prove that ever permutation can be uniquely decomposed into a product of transpositions >she bursts out my office crying >w-- >days later got called into the department office and got chewed out for being transphobic and that l'll have my PhD grant revoked if this happens again >mfw

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Anon is a kid in the 90's. | /r/Greentext

File: file.png (131 KB, 248x203) 0000 Anonymous 05/14/22(Sat)07:53:10 No.50432682 [Reply] >AAAAAAARGH THE HIGH PITCHED FREQUENCIES! IT'S REWRITING MY BRAIN!! >l'M GOING TO F------ KILL MYSELF I CAN'T HANDLE IT ANYMOREEEE

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