Anon is Dr Doofenshmirtz | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 02/13/22(Sun)21:41:54 No.872640148 >be me >unfathomably rich scientist >invent new military grade machine >try to use it to rule over a county >weird ass teal duck bursts into 75 KB PNG lab gRrrRrrRrr >h-------- the duck knows kung fu >the little f----- destroys my multimillion dollar machine Curse you perry the platypus

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon has something to say about the half time show | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/13/22(Sun)20:46:03 No.872637242 >be me, eminem >at superbowl halftime show >look around "w-- theres only black people up here" >even all the dancers are black or mixed >mfw I'm not black enough to say the n- word but I'm black enough to be the only white person on stage 167 KB JPG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 02/13/22(Sun)20:47:22 No.872637310 I knew 4chan had something to say about this kek

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The apple dosent fall far from the tree | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/01/20(Sat)21:02:27 No.56535266 >talking to my dad about my depression >explaining passive suicidality >"while I'm not going to actively try to kill myself, if a truck was coming straight at me I probably wouldn't get out of the way" >his reply 93 KB JPG >his f------ reply >"oh that's how I've felt my whole life" >mfw

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Don't do it bros | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/16/21(Fri)01:07:26 No.45172310 >Be paramedic >Seen dozens of suicides in the last 8 years >The reactions of the loved ones are always bad 169 KB JPG >None is ever worse than a dad loosing his son There is not a thing in this world that is more depressing sounding than a man sobbing while clutching his sons lifeless body. I remember one who killed himself by shotgun slug after he came back from Iraq. There was nothing left of him, and his father got home just as we were getting ready to leave. I couldn't let him see, so I stood there and just didn't let him through. He went downstairs to the basement and clutched his sons old baseball glove, rocking back and forth, just saying "papas here, buddy, papas here." Don't do it anons. >>45172699 #

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Anon likes to look a man in the eye | /r/Greentext

>662901212 # >I like to look into a man's eyes when I kill him >Like, really close.

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Anon is Living in 1984 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/10/22(Thu)02:16:38 No.67365517 >gf says if she catches me acting like a femboy bottom on twitter again she's gonna tell my parents 31 KB JPG 6 Replies View Thread

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Anon Joins the Army | /r/Greentext

File: 1604478787327.png (62 KB, 657x527) >go to recruiter >ask if i can be a tank >no

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Anon shares a life hack | /r/Greentext

Being legitimately attracted to BBWS is such a life hack. As long as I can remember , I've always just been more attracted to big girls. When I was a teenager I quickly found out they were abundant, and no one paid any attention to them, making them extremely easy to hook up with. The only downside was the social repercussions of others finding out. 399 KB JPG >huge t---/ass >they are everywhere >desperate for attention >put in extra effort to please >easy to f--- >unlimited p---- life hack

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Anon discusses Doomguy’s mental health | /r/Greentext

05/31/16(Tue)17:53:36 No.339520563 How does Doomguy not have PTSD? 215 KR IPG : Anonymous 05/31/16(Tue)17:55:57 No.339520780 Not everyone gets PTSD from traumatic events. : Anonymous 05/31/16(Tue)17:56:52 No.339520879 Because he is the traumatic event.

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anon flys too close to the sun | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/06/19(Tue)03:08:47 No.119155050 >>119151659 (OP)_# The other dayI had a dream that I could suck my own d--- but then I accidentally choked on it and died 64 KB JPG >>119155083 # >>119155341 # : Anonymou Anonymous 08/06/19(Tue)03:24:37 No.119155341 : Anonymou >119155050 # A modern Icarus : Anonymou

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Anon orange in the ti | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/23/20(Mon)13:52:45 No.134576054 >in Croatia with my parents >walking down the street >a croat woman is tending to some little tree in her garden >my dad approaches her near the fence and says with thick slavic accent >"ORANGE?" >she says "yes" 55 KB JPG >we walk away ORANGE? yes. ایرو نمزعج اورائج بن شابيرو مزعج أورائج

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Anon Plays a Game With Balloons... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: ateH+IMA Confession Thread 02/08/22(Tue)18:40:04 No.360262889 When I was 9, my neighbor had a birthday party in her backyard complete with hired clown and tons of helium balloons. I gathered about 15 balloons and tied the strings together to make one rope. Then I tied that to the collar of her kitten and, with her and her parents screaming NO! and rushing towards me, I set it aloft. The balloons carried the cat straight up in the air and soon was just a dot in the sky. The father actually assaulted me; he punched me in the head and threw me on the floor. His wife had to hold him back. The girl was screaming and crying hysterically and I ran home. My own parents wanted to kill me and until the day they moved they never spoke to me or my family again. The cat was never recovered. I feel a great deal of shame for that one impulsive act that forever changed me and my parents. I'm sorry. 87 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: JQUUmmcj )L 02/08/22(Tue)18:41:31 No.360263063 : Anonymous (ID: hGwloc0z) E3 02/08/22(Tue)18:42:19 No.360263156 >>360262889 (OP) # based

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American Moment | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: Z/6fH2x/ 02/19/18(Mon)07:42:29 No.161082716 Alex went to school and got shot dead . How are you Americans going to stop this weird problem ? 26 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: WTO 2XN5 02/19/18(Mon)07:45:05 No.161082898 >>161082716 (OP) # >How are you Americans going to stop this weird problem ? I'm pretty confident Alex won't be shot dead again, so I think we have this one covered. >>161083006 # >>161086083 # >>161086843 # >>161086991 #

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