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Anonymous 38 KB JPG 06/08/21(Tue)19:51:50 No.146433504 >have a coworker who is Dutch >we both need to go to the same project the next day >offer to drive and say I will pick him up >he says thanks and gives me his adress >the next day I drive over to his home >he isn't fully ready to leave yet but offers me to wait inside >he asks if I want a coffee >say sure because I didn't have my morning coffee yet >his wife makes me a coffee while he finishes getting ready >drive him to the project and drop him back of at his home in the evening >he says "thank you so much for driving anon!" >get home myself >hear a notification comming in on my phone >it is a 'tikkie' for 0.50 EUR from my Dutch colleague for the morning coffee I had at his place

Anonymous 11/27/24(Wed)23:29:29 No.146551057 1713812614849717.png 1.49 MB PNG ITT: we pretend we're in Gotham Anonymous 11/28/24(Thu)08:34:28 No.146555487 I was waiting at the bus stop and next thing I know Im at Batmans feet with a broken collar bone and three weeks missing. Turns out Mad Hatter put one of stupid hats on me when my back was turned. Work says theyve already filled my position and theres nothing they can do I hate this city I hate this city Anonymous 11/28/24(Thu)08:36:40 No.146555501 I was blowing a dude in crime alley but his c--- tasted funny. Kinda... earthy? I looked up and it was Clayface. Called me a f-- and ran away laughing. 69 KB JPG

Oh my GOD just talk to actual women, we're all horny and unhappy too you're not special you f------ weirdos New York Post @nypost- Apr 15 Tech exec predicts 'Al girlfriends' will create $1B business: 'Comfort at the end of the day' trib.al/XORAIML : Anonymous (ID: P3y3PZCt >talk to women ew weirdo >dont talk to women ew weirdo 11/16/24(Sat)11:35:50 No.488637069

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Anon works with teens | /r/Greentext

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Anon wants to quit before it’s even started | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/30/21(Thu)10:10:54 No.66776022 >19 >never had a friend >never been in a relationship >never kissed a girl >never had sex >cant drive 77 KB JPG >never had a real job Its too late for me. I cant fix myself 7 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 12/30/21(Thu)10:19:25 No.66776104 >>66776022 (OP) # You're 19 your life has just begun and youre already giving up. Have you tried not being a pathetic bitch? If not I hear it helps.

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anon hates the fr*nch | /r/Greentext

1638153933089.jpg 86 KB JPG >see french name in-game >kill them only and nobody else even if it means losing

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Hmmm i wonder | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/28/18(Wed)19:48:39 No.49553714 >the one girl who was always really nice to me in HS is now studying in uni to professionally take care of autists Hmmm 6 KB JPG 1 Reply / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon gets his activity cucked | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/27/17(Thu)11:49:09 No.29962622 29962632 >>29962658 >>29962668 2>29962675 >>29962679 >>29962730 >>29962824 >>29962627 >>29962630 >29963405 >>29964050 >29964058 >>29962548 Assholes like you have ruined the cuckolding fetish for guys like me. Now it's just a stupid joke. F--- you. O Anonymous 04/27/17(Thu)11:57: 13 No.29962675 >>29962710 >29962718 29962729 >>29962803 >>29962809 >>29962824 >>29962833 >>29962851 >>29962910 >29962930 >29963117 >29963387 29963405 29963426 >29964058 >29964091 File: 1304047 safe oc humanizel.) png (99 KB, 700x599) >29962622 It's almost like the thing you love has been f----- by another man.

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Anon larps as someone who gets pussy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)08:09:47 No.871819371 You WILL f--- the bag. Last month, I was going in on a one night stand with this reaally hot girl. Things we getting hot, I layed her on her bed, unzipped my fly, and right as I'm putting it in, she asks "Where's your condom?". Right then and there I instantly went flaccid, pulled up my pants, and walked the f--- out. Using a condom is not real sex. If you actually use a condom, you a f------ a bag and you don't have an ounce of dignity, and you may even be a pathetic cuckold. Shame on durex 113 KB JPG you for f------ a bag, and not a real p----. >but! safe sex safe sex! Pull out, have your woman tie her tubes, birth control, even early abortion. >inb4 STDS Don't be an unhealthy fat barrel of monkey spunk, and you should be fine. Don't be an idiot, either. >inb4 angery libtards, kys, idiot, autist, etc By telling me these things you are confirming your status as a cuck to me. Get off my thread If you refuse to f--- the BAG, you have my respect, anon. 27 Replies / 10 Images View Thread

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Anon finds a loophole | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/25/18(Wed)15:31:06 No.775355811 File: 1322261238567.jpg (482 KB, 1200x1800) >>775353580 (OP) >girl friendzoned me >l stopped being her friend >no longer in the friendzone because we're not friends Now you know how to escape, you're welcome.

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Anon's neighbour grows weed | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 45657137 1 perccel ezelőtt •.. Anon Does Drug Bust >Be me, 14 at the time >Lights constantly flickering and PC randomly turning off >Call up electricity company >They supposedly fix the problem >It still happens >Mum jokes that the neighbour is probably growing cannabis and is tapping into our electricity supply >Neighbour has a big shed >I decide to climb over his fence and take a look inside >somuchweed.png >I take pictures with my phone >Come back home and tell my mummy >I call 101 (Non-emergency line) >Woman thinks I'm lying >Next day the police smash down his door and take all his weed away 155,5 kB PNG >He goes to jail and his kid gets taken away That's what you get for messing with my Minecraft experience. REPLY

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Anon is stupid, very stupid | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/11/20(Wed)09:58:52 No.57114027 >driving down the road >thinking about how thin the line between life and death is >I could literally just turn the steering wheel and die >or would I? >throw the wheel to the left and fly into 142 KB JPG the ditch >don't die >car stuck in ditch I feel so retarded it's almost empowering

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Anon goes to the gym | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/01/22(Tue)12:21:06 No.871826313 >be me >Gym rat >Also quite autistic >Go to school STY >Some girls talking to themselves >Walk by then and they notice me >"Hey anon what's your insta" >"Uhm I don't have one" 7 KB JPG >Moment of silence >One girls says "Huh" >Awkwardly walk away and continue with my day >Get home >Go to the gym >Do the best gym session in my entire life >Get about 5 massive PRS >Never gonna forget that day

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Anon is looking for a bathroom | /r/Greentext

>be me >gotta pee real bad >can't hold it I'm in the middle of the street >no public toilets over here either >go into a restaurant >head to the bathroom without talking to 120 KB PNG anyone >robot looking f----- stops me and says the bathroom is for customers only >tell him I already ordered >"uh okay sorry about that" >go into bathroom and take a piss >about to head out ... >the same robot screams "SIR" >WHAT >your order is ready >take the order without paying and leave >never go again into that restaurant ever That hamburger was actually good to be honest ...

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An interesting title | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/17/18(Wed)00:22:54 No.42551236 >Teacher f------ a hot student in the gym locker rooms after school (Fired she was 18) >Teacher got so mad he threw a desk at a student (Fired) >Teacher came to school wasted (Fired) >Teacher browsed the living f--- out of Infowars and would regurgitate every dumb as f--- conspiracy theory to us instead of teaching us American History. Also made us watch Wizard of Oz alongside Dark Side of the Moon. Once stood on his desk SCREAMING about water filters. Named the jew a few times. Also heavily hinted that the Holocaust was faked (Still employed) >Class bullied a teacher so badly she cried (Still Employed) >Goth chick told us she was going to bring a gun to class and murder us. The class jock responded with "Do it c---" >Kid punched a window out in the hallway and cut a major artery and died (Still dead) >Stacy and cheerfriends botched a "throw the girl in the air" during a pep rally and she snapped her arm to a 90degree angle in front of the whole school >Kid s--- himself during a test because he didn't study for it Oh small town USA

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Greentext Stories - Anon lies to his gf | /r/Greentext

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