Anon has a new fetish | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon finds porn | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/05/22(Wed)13:53:11 No.66858191 >boyfriend writes script for a p--- video starts off with guy saying "OH YEAAAAAAAAH IT'S FAPPING TIME!" 211 KB PNG https://www.x------.com/video6442304 View Thread

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Anon cannot be discovered | /r/Greentext

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Anon is white | /r/Greentext

OAnonymous 08/21/15(Fri)20:56:15 No.307324631 File: pic jpg (131 KB, 1600x902) >>307322435 >> O Anonymous 08/21/15(Fri)20:57:25 No.307324746 ► >>307324631 this website is for whites only >> O Anonymous 08/21/15(Fri)21:02:30 No.307325124 File: pic2 jpg (1.42 MB, 3264x1840) >>307324746

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Anon brings his roommate to see Dr. Terry | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/05/22(Wed)03:13:04 No.870019628 >Be me, in university and living with five (5) roommates. >One of them is scared he'd caught a dirty d--- and doesn't know what to do. >Doesn't want to get tested, so I 55 KB JPG volunteer to get tested with him to calm his sex-addled nerves. >Tell him we'd arrange to go see Dr. Terry. >l go in first. >Tell Dr. Terry whať's up. >He just gives me a cup to pee into and a requisition for some blood work. >Spend the next twenty (20) minutes chatting with Dr. Terry about wristwatches and riding motorcycles. >Roommate's turn. >Asks me how it went before he goes in. >Tell him Dr. Terry pushed a metal rod up my peehole until it hit something hard and made a clinking noise. >Tell him my mouth tastes of Aspirin®. >His face when:

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Anon’s friend is a pain in the neck | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/05/13(Tue)20:50:44 No.514564416 >Be in 7th >Friend can crack his neck real loud and can turn his head completely sideways >Have a sub during choir >We think it would be funny if he made it look like he snapped his own neck >In between songs he screams out "I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!" >Proceeds to make the loudest crack ive ever heard >Falls to the ground >The sub screams and runs out the door >lols were had He then hid in a storage closet and was suspended

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anons autism is a weapon to surpass metal gear | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1 hour ago 808833626 >be me >~15 >metal gear solid 3 just came out >save up hard-earned money to buy a bunch of military gear to look like snake >every couple of weeks i go out late at night and sneak around town, going into malls and such while avoiding detection >sometimes i walk through the jungle >i live in florida, which is very similar in terrain to vietnam and they used to train special forces during the vietnam war in florida >so its the best place for sneaky beaky >family goes to ybor city (district of Tampa with a very large cuban population) for vacation to escape hurricane katrina (of course it just ended up turning and we got hit anyways) >we walk into a cuban tobacco shop >my mom is a mexican immigrant, starts speaking to the guy in spanish >looks at me >"you know anon, back in mexico our parents used to let us smoke and drink every now and then. wanna try a cigar?" >"sure mom, but let me take it home, ill try it later" >i buy a big, fat, brown cuban cigar just like the one snake smokes >fast forward a few days, we head back to town, the whole place is ruined >national guard is there, handing out food and water >our house is mostly okay, just some fallen trees which i help clean up >fast forward to night time >get geared up, sneak out at 1 in the morning to go complete my "mission" >i decide to head to a big outdoor mall that everybody my age goes to after school >sneak past armed, uniformed soldiers on my way, i feel like a f------ legend >finally get to a piece of jungle that overlooks the mall (florida has plenty of places like this, raw untamed jungle right next to developed buildings and neighborhoods) >kneel down, light my cigar and put it in my mouth >cuban guy told me not to inhale but i do it anyways >death_by_coughing.mp3 >finally, i kneel down and get an overview of the mall with my cigar >feel like a total badass >make my way across the field >f--- around in the mall, go into shops with the windows broken, have fun >suddenly hear something 4 REPLIES Anonymous 1 hour ago 808834149 >>808833626 (OP) >a bunch of ghetto kids from my high school are looting and f------ around, about 5 of them >i hide behind a counter >i hear them coming >they see me squatting down, looking right at them >they are like 6 feet from me, just staring >ohfuck.jpg >"EY ITS DAT WEIRD ASS N---- FROM SCHOOL WHAT U DOIN BRUH" >they begin approaching me >"EY L-- BEAT THIS N---- ASS AHAHАНА" >i guess they couldnt see that i was armed because it was so dark >i have a tippman paintball pistol on a dropleg holster, i unholster it and take out my knife >KNIFEGUN.png >about to teach them the basics of cqc >"Aw s--- n---- this n---- aint playin..." >i begin approaching them, looking like pic related >cigar in my mouth, gun drawn >"ey bro l-- bounce this n---- serious bro" >they walk backwards, slowly at first, then pick up speed >"BRO L-- GO THIS N---- CRAZY BRO" >feel like a badass, but kinda shaken up >put out the cigar and go home >a few weeks later, school is back in >nobody knows my true identity >i am snake >snake is me Truly, my autism knows no bounds

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Anon saves the humanity | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/18/19(Mon)12:34:50 No.454926395 >be me >player starts on me >be complete autist >never goes out >lives alone >player lose patience because virus doesn't spread >he surrenders 6 KB JPG >mfw when I saved humanity

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Anon has a reddit moment | /r/Greentext

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Brie's new Boyfriend | /r/Greentext

01/05/22(Wed)15:04:45 No.161793194 : Anonymous Captain Marvel This guy saw captain marvel 140 times!!! 4E93AAAE-CC03-4FA1-995A-5D40A7EC2C96.jpg 746 KB JPG >140 times Did they f---? : Anonymous 01/05/22(Wed)15:06:22 No.161793260 >>161793194 (OP) # >feminist film >biggest fan is a man Imao >>161793631 #

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Anon has an issue | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/22/20(Sun)01:23:40 No.57267483 Neighbors saw me making out with one of the stray cats. 226 KB PNG 3 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 03/22/20(Sun)01:24:36 No.57267494 why were you making out with a cat

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Anon loses his v card | /r/Greentext

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Anon does a bad think | /r/Greentext

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