Anon passes blame | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous 11/23/11(Wed)03:46 No.10063353 >Be 16 >Girl I've known since we were like 4 is having a party >Had been taking these pills post-operation >They cause me to be constipated >F--- it >Go to this party >Friend forfuckingever is flirting up a storm >Sorta brush it off as sloppiness >Party winding down >Nowhere to sleep >"Oh, just come with me" >Ugh, fine >F--- the t--- right off her >Be farting every hump, she's half-passed out anyways. no worries >Start to worry >Fall asleep back to back, completely naked >Wake up to RANCID smell >Oh god no >Take out cell phone >Look over, I had the green-apple splatters all over her back and fine linens >Whatthefuckdoldo.avi >Take s--- in hands, smear between her ass-cheeks >Leave note saying "You shat yourself, so I left". dont know why >Put clothes on, RUN out door and walk home >Dont hear from her >2 weeks later she killed herself. Anonymous 11/23/11(Wed)03:49 No.10063371 >>10063353 ahahahahahahahahahahsfbgbomgimdying

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon doesn't believe in shiny rock | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: KCQMDM82) Gold is a Jew meme 09/06/21(Mon)06:40:06 No.40473207 >can't buy drugs >can't buy p---- >can't even buy bread Tell me again how this shiny rock is better than the USD anon? COL DEN PEPE 126 KB JPG

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Anon experiences the effects of social isolation | /r/Greentext

1h (9/13 8:03) · 862971249 22 Re · 1 Img JPG 119KB (900 × 900) 9 Replies >first year of college was online since covid >lose social skills over lockdown >only ever talk to friends over discord >finally come to college this semester >be good looking and /fit/ so think that it will be easy talking to people >can't talk to people for s--- because haven't done in a long time >guys with no chins are getting more action than me >almost a month in, still haven't been invited to a single party >sitting in my room typing this Is it over for me?

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Anon gets rejected | /r/Greentext

>>62797339 (OP) # >be me >15 >lonely twink >spend most of my time online >get bored 257 KB JPG >want a boyfriend but not a single gay dude at my school >one dude i'm close friends with, gonna start a band together >go on here and ask what to do >terrible responses but dont know what else to do >take one anons advice to just try and kiss him >invite him over to my house for the weekend >wait until we're practicing in my dads den >in self arrogance i think i'm great at it >get the motivation to try >our lips connect for half a second before he realizes what i'm doing >punches me in the face and runs out the door shouting "I'M NOT A F-----" >lay there and cry until my mom gets home >avoid going to school for a few days until my mom makes me go >he refuses to talk to me and i lose my only friend

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Anon is looking for a job | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/12/21(Sun)23:57:38 No.65359888 Anyone experienced in the p--- industry? I want to star in as a cuck. I have perfect look for it. >Balding >Slightly overweight >Glasses 96 KB JPG >Well groomed beard >Small limp penis >White >Middle aged looking but still young Will a career in p---------- help me moneymax?

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Anon has a schizo meltdown | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/15/21(Mon)18:02:00 No.15768003 How do I cook this massive Wal Mart steak? 2.4 MB JPG : Anonymous 03/15/21(Mon)18:06:28 No.15768042 >>15768003 (OP) # >massive - mass - Massachusetts >Wal Mart - Wal - Walled >Cook - crook- crooked >steak - stake-wood- woods I know this is your way of telling me that I was wrong and I don't find it very funny. Maybe you won't find it funny anymore now that I let everyone see what you're doing. I'm not afraid of you anymore and I have nothing left to lose. >>15768066 # >>15768117 # >>15768172 # >>15768585 # >>15768978 # >>15769096 # >>15769102 # >>15769399 #

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Anon has the day off | /r/Greentext

File: 928893DC-B25E-4B67-9CA4-F(..).jpg (237 KB, 750x872) O Anonymous 09/12/21(Sun)23:32:24 No.862977916 >>862978120 >be me >wake up early to get ready for my job >text from boss, I've got the day off because they're overstaffed >ready to celebrate, then I remember my dogs and my kitty >time to have a little fun >get ready like normal, dressed up and teeth brushed >grab my stuff and get to the door >my pets are circling me, trying their best to keep me home >even the kitty is rubbing against my legs trying to keep me from the door >after a long battle, I make a dramatic show of "okay, you win today" and lie down on the floor with them. They've been happier today than they've ever been before, they were super lovey all day long TO DO

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Anon shows his appreciation | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/28/20(Mon)09:59:21 No.59076906 >Girl at the gym saw me pat the dumbells after working out 42 KB PNG : Anonymous 12/28/20(Mon)10:01:02 No.59076923 >>59076906 (OP) # Good, she knows your a man who respects your environment and his friends : Anonymous 12/28/20(Mon)10:02:54 No.59076944 >>59076906 (OP) # based retard : Anonymous 12/28/20(Mon)10:03:06 No.59076947 >>59076906 (OP) # based

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Anon plays rising storm | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/16/21(Fri)16:08:21 No.49012225 Bringing a sword to a sword fight As an American soldier kill an Axis soldier wielding a Katana, with a Katana. Unlocked on Feb 20, 2016, 1:22 PM 0.2% of players have this achievement marinesamurai.jpg 67 KB JPG >>49011159 # That s--- is so fun on both ends. >j--- everywhere >rifle runs empty, switch to 1911 >they keep coming >barely avoid getting skewered by a j-- officer >kill him with my last .45 rounds >more coming >no ammo >ohfuckohshit >pick up sword >sword fight another j-- officer and win >achievement unlocked >pic related Honestly this happened like 5 years ago but I still remember it because it was so fun.

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Anon trolls Demon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/07/16(Wed)21:04:57 No.18404110 IMG_5149.jpg 79 KB JPG >make deal with demon to get a s--- ton of gold >use gold to fund filtering salt out of entire ocean >use remaining funds to launch salt into orbit >salt forms ring around the earth >when demon comes back to f--- you up, it can't get pass salt circle

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Anon realizes the truth about traps | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/17(Thu)14:25:28 No.738045411 >all the boy p---- threads finally get to me >feel compelled to vist a t----- prostitute >find one that isn't full t----- but more trap-like >white, 5'4, flat t---, cute face etc >immediately notice how much bigger 289 KB PNG d--- is than mine >she calls my d--- "cute" and says it's "just right" >when we 69 I can't stop thinking about all those trolls who say traps are gay >with a d--- in my mouth twice the size of mine, suddenly these accusations seem legitimate >she stops and ask if I want to change positions >l just lay there with a d--- in my mouth as tears slowly gather in the corners of my eyes >break down and ask her if she thinks I'm gay >she spends the next 20 minutes comforting me and making me feel better >come home having sucked a d--- without even getting off >l've never felt like such a beta f----- in my entire life

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But Was it All Real Fun? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Burning bridges thread 09/12/21(Sun)00:17:16 No.65349331 III start >meet girl in high school >think nothing of her at first >she's shy but kind of tomboyish, in the engineering and robotics clubs and classes >we become good friends in senior year, 限美現美りヨ美 14 KB JPG sharing some classes and chatting a lot >did dumb s--- like share an earbud while listening to music, laughing so much the class would look at us >keep in touch very consistently for several years, not every day but having a full conversation several times a month >over the years she comes out of her shell a bit, starts getting into friend groups and hit on a lot >watch helplessly as she changes >despise the blatant and vapid narcissism that consumes nearly every girl >conversations that used to be actually fun turn into listening simulator about nothing but herself >ghost her for a while, she calls me >I thought she might have been worried about me but its the same s--- >she says I sound different, the reality is I have no energy left for her >I push her away and I can hear choking up and her voice breaking Probably the coolest girl I ever knew. I'm already so repulsed by most personalities but I really liked her, she deserves someone good. Burn any bridges lately anons?

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Anon is big in Japan | /r/Greentext

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