F--- you, Philip | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

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Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon uses twitter | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous E 05/29/21(Sat)06:10:14 No.63891076 >scrolling twitter >come across post making fun of someone who drew a diagram of dragon d---- >looking through it for s---- and giggles >get an erection 20 KB JPG Oh no : Anonymous 05/29/21(Sat)06:41:33 No.63891503 >>63891076 (OP) # >scrolling twitter thats the problem anon.

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Anon shaved his balls | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/12/17(Sat)15:57:17 No.39025354 >be me >age 13 >watch p--- for the first time >notice guy in porns d--- has no hair >whatisthis.jpeg >am I different? >decide to a little manscaping 151 KB JPG >have no idea how to shave >grab spare razor blade, not in a case, just the blade >start to grate it gently on my balls >feelsgoodman.png >grate harder >grate too hard >slit open nutsuck >feelsbadman >bleeding profusely from b------- >worst and deepest pain l've ever experienced >bandage n------ >n------ swells with internal bleeding >Get blood on all my underwear in the following weeks like a girl on her period >finally stops >fap >c-- blood >go to doctor months later >horrible scar along n------ >"what the f--- is this, anon?" >ldk they must've butchered my circumcision Mfw

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Anon’s a retard | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/23/18(Sat)19:13:48 No.772383429 >be 9 >playing Paper Mario >halfway through game get to part where you have to buy a quest item from a store >shop owner (toad) says item is out of stock and will be in stock soon 309 KB PNG >assume it means I have to actually WAIT for it >spend 3 IRL months checking in the game to see if the item has come in stock yet >8 years later watching a speedrun of the game >realize you didn't have to f------ wait for it, you just had to f------ continue the game and it'd come after a checkpoint am I retarded 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 06/23/18(Sat)19:26:54 No.772384417 yes

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Anon is reasoning | /r/Greentext

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Anon gets dominated by a cockroach | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous The s------- episode 02/15/19(Fri)09:01:33 No.50985132 >Taking a s--- >A huge cockroach comes out of a little hole in the wall facing me >lt just stands there, then turns sideways and twitches its antenna everywhere >Motionlessly stare at it >lt stops all motion too 104 KB JPG >Drop a s--- in the toilet >lt drops a s--- at pretty much the same time >Then it turns around and nonchalantly walks back into the hole I don't know of any words to accurately describe how this scenario made me feel. 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon is a rememberer | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Mz+F72xl) 04/23/14(Wed)02:24:34 No.543522159 >be 3 years old >standing in the living room next to leather sofa >for no apparent reason think to myself "i will remember this moment" >still do

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Anon’s cousin wants to go bowling with him | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/08/18(Sat)23:56:44 No.49733868 >be me >beta suicidal virgin >go to uni >pretty miserable and not a lot of friends >most people know that i am depressed 99 KB PNG >get a text from a cousin >he tells me not to kill myself >w--.jpg >"did you also become on of those f--- who tell me not to cuz of no reasons?" >"no anon i have great plans. We gonna live together, get hella bitchez, play lots of vidya and have a f------ mansion." >mfw it is the best thing i have ever heard in my life >mfw someone wants me in their life >mfw it has been a week since that text but i am still happy Thank you, cousin 1 Reply View Thread

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Anon slept with the whole class | /r/Greentext

>be me >taking standardized test >after test we are given the option to sleep >take a nap 7 KB JPG >i just slept with all the girls in my class >see ya later virgins

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Anon goes visit his uncle in the hospital | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/14/17(Fri)15:49:12 No.38371043 >uncle was dying of cancer >on hospital bed >doctors said he had 1 day left to live >sad, go to my room and lock the door >radomly decide to do a blood sacrifice by sacrificing my life for his >drew a pentagram on a piece of paper 19 KB JPG and then cut my palm with a knife and soaked the paper with blood >prayed that my uncle gets better in exchange for my life >next day uncle makes a miraculous recovery This was just a coincidence r-right?

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Anon is done | /r/Greentext

2h (4/11 21:16) · 63162749 JPG 29KB · (403 × 331) >>63159936 >meet a woman >find out she has feet Like I try to be open and tolerant about most things but man, that sort of s--- is just f----- ...

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Anon is a Warrio fan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/04/21(Thu)22:41:48 No.846579260 >Halloween 2016 >go to costume themed swingers party >dressed as Wario >a few hours in start talking to girl dressed as Princess Peach 89 KB PNG >she tells me 'lets make Mario jealous' >go to nearby Motel >get room >have odd RP sex >about to c-- >suddenly yell 'i'mma Wario, i'mma gunna c--!" >scream 'WWWAAHH!!!' While cuming >says it was the worst sex experience of her life Atleast i came tho

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My mans really do be tossing inn the towel | /r/Greentext

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