Anon hates Canada | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 05/30/21(Sun)02:09:15 No.855655547 be a mass murderer >get arrested >get executed >wake up in someone else's body >think you got a second chance to right your wrongs >quickly discover that you're in 20 KB JPG Canada >hell now doesn't seem so bad >kill yourself >wake up in a different man's body >you're in Canada again >this is your final destination. you cannot escape. god has punished you by making you perpetually Canadian.

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon sees a dogfight | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/27/13(Wed)05:01 No.55852 >be 16 >hear dogs obviously attacking something in back yard >go out and get them to leave it alone >oh s--- it's a bloody 33 KB PNG unssod >think Its dead, go to put it In garbage >notice Its stillI breathing >decide to put it out of it's misery >grab a broken skateboard and smash It over it's head >possum starts convulsing >oh god why aren't you dying >keep beating it >feel like Christopher bale killing Jared letto In American psycho >it finally dies >check the body and see the dogs barely scratched it >mfw I remember possums play dead

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It was a pleasure doing business with you | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/26/21(Wed)20:21:58 No.3811102 1599872026748.jpg 102 KB JPG >>3810932 # >you give me a banana >I give you a 15 minute subscription to my "not biting your fingers" service Sounds like a peaceful exchange of goods and services to me. >>3811355 #

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Anon talks about his favourite garment | /r/Greentext

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Anon posts on reddit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Hace 34 minutos 774720631 >be me >instagram normie >think all memes come from reddit >sign up for reddit, just passed 1 year >find out memes come from 4chan >be me Is there a place beyond 4chan? 1 REPLY Anonymous Hace 34 minutos 774720676 >>774720631 (OP) 9gag 1 REPLY Anonymous Hace 33 minutos 774720703 >>774720676 and past that is ifunny

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Anon likes rap battles | /r/Greentext

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Anon's first school day | /r/Greentext

>Be me >First day of first grade >Dont really know anybody >See some girl that looks really 1.42 MB GIF cute >l start walking over >Random kid walks up >Says, yo thats my girlfriend >Girl in back starts laughing >So many emotions come forth >Decide the only logical thing to do is punch the f----- in jaw >Yell, "GET WRECKED F------ >Nurse runs up says, "What have you done?" >Turns out I broke the f------ jaw >Never allowed to teach at that school again.

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Anon smells something good | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/30/21(Sun)18:16:03 No.63915484 >get into the elevator for my apartment >qt neighbor is in there coming up from the basement parking with a few grocery bags >say hello >suddenly notice a delicious smell 102 KB JPG >ask him what takeout he has because it smells so good >he looks confused for a second then bursts out laughing >says he just has eggs bread and milk in his bags >says he farted just after he got in the elevator

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Anon forgets he‘s in real life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/27/21(Tue)06:26:09 No.63407494 >9/10 coworker says she needs to take a piss but the toilets are under maintenance >forget I'm not on the internet and almost say "why don't you piss in my mouth" It almost came out of my mouth. 303 KB JPG Luckily I could hold myself back.

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And Taiwan is a country | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: XAO9SW72) 05/29/21(Sat)15:23:10 No.323709709 >just realised 'norway' and 'the netherlands' are two different countries 85 KB PNG : Anonymous (ID: wBfdEuB+ ) 05/29/21 (Sat)15:24:39 No.323709792 every day someone realizes that austria and australia are not the same >>323714865 # >>323715991 # >>323722800 # >>323725160 # >>323726681 # >>323729695 # : Anonymous (ID: QudX55WZ ) [•1 05/29/21(Sat)18:28:44 No.323723272 >>323709709 (OP)_# >just realized the netherlands is danish, which has nothing to do with denmark 14 KB JPG

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anon criticizes enderman | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/13/18(Thu)13:28:16 No.787288109 >don't like eye contact >pick up random things they find >make random noises Are endermen autistic? 86 KB JPG

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Anon cooks dinner for his family | /r/Greentext

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Anon is fat | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/22/18(Wed)01:29:11 No.47665686 074e7c5b-329e-49d7-b555-91929a374b37.jpg 57 KB JPG >be me >Watching Netflix health documentary >"haha fat people" >They're filming fatties in the street >"hey, I have that shirt" >"hey, I have those cargo shorts" >"hey, I know that building" >mfw 1 Reply View Thread

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