Anon protects his swamp | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

File: preke jpg (43 KB, 1280x720) Anonymous 04/04/18(Wed)00:04:46 No.37425000 >2013 >finally saved up enough to purchase a shotgun >keep it by my bed 24/7 in case of intruder >fast forward to 2014, when shrek memes were at their height >have allstar as my alarm because autist >wake up at 1 AM one night because i hear something in the living room >sounds like someone talking >thisisit.onion >do the only thingi can do >load up my alarm and play it at full blast through my bluetooth system >"someBODY ONCE TOLD ME" >grab my shotgun and rush downstairs and see two guys with my tv >scream the first thing that comes to mind >"WHAT ARE YE DOIN' IN MY SWAMP!?" >these men have just been confronted by a naked overweight man with a shotgun and a shrek quote >they immediately drop the tv and run out the front door >chase after them as "the years start coming and they don't stop coming." blares throughout the household >continue to pursue them down the block until they f--- off into a van >mfw the series of robberies in the neighbourhood stops after this >swamp status: secured

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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