Anon has a best friend | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

>be 14 >have a best friend >plays vidya, talk girls, a genuinely good friend. >about a month ago his mom passed away >terminal cancer, horrible thing >a week before his birthday his dad 50 KB JPG reached out to me >confusion.jpeg >"hey anon, it's friendanon's dad, I know you too are pretty close and next week is his birthday, figured we could do something nice for him." >l agree >"that's great, as you know ever since friendanon's mom passed away he's been pretty bummed out so I thought we could make something to remind him of her." >wtfwhybutok.png >agree to help him out because friendanon is my best friend. >mfw his dad asked me to bring a can of tomato sauce >whatthefuck.exe >fast forward to his birthday party >we just hanging out, some friends and family there just talking and congratulating friendanon, pretty cool b'day party >friendanon's dad clears his throat >"ehm so as you all know it's friendanon's birthday today, so for some time l've been thinking what would make anon's birthday memorable for him" >friendanon's dad takes out a plate with pasta and red sauce, puts it on the table and puts on a gentle smile. >friendanon tastes it and begins to cry >turns out it was his mother's special recipe. >anon gets so excited and emotional he throws up >he's all shaking >his palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy >there's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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