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retarded gf wow a dog I only drink chocolate milk what ice cream please don't leave me *barks trips and falls* video games huh? messy hair f--- what anime I like animals

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"Retarded GF"


Uploaded by Don May 25, 2017 at 03:34PM EDT

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Origin Entry: Ideal GF

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HOSPITALLER GF "The healing is just as Faithful, Kind, Devoted rewarding as the hurting~" Doesn't have the best aim "Did I forget to turn full auto off? Woops~" That heretic definitely didn't need that many holes in him- 5'10" 577 gray TH Her dove's named Celest Surprisingly sweet for a Sister "You're sure it doesn't hurt Dear? Let me take a look" Fuses over every scratch you get Very soft and doting "No need to fuss Dear, the Emperor has blessed you with me to keep you alive~ It doesn't hurt! Has the Good Stuff Met after she amputated a heretics arm holding your neck "Unhand them Heretic FILTH!!! . . . Are you alright Dear?" You blacked out and woke up in a Rhino with your head in her lap "Ah! Loyal Servant of the Emperor, you awaken. Please rest, you have earned it~" Gives you a personal checkup after every battle "Let me care for you, Dear" Mommy vibes? "Honey~ It's time for your purity injection!" You know it's medicine ... Probably Makes sure you're taking care of yourself
Gets super happy when you give her 'medals' Loyal and Strong "Thank you Sah! Hehehe" The comissar gave you a sticker sheet, the gold stars are her favorite You may give her too many-your almost out but she's too damn cute "I doesn't Puts her head in your lap when you read to her understands most of it, but I likes yah voice" Dates typically consist of simple things like that Loves when you cook for her Likes sitting you on her lap when she eats "You can 'ave some too~ Tries not to eat your rations too "Offy-sah! The food- guy gave me extra rations!" GOR MEAT Has a Bonehead chip in her Sleeps with it in noggin "I'ms smarta than 10'0" the other ones! Got's a medal when I spelt out mah whole name!" She's very proud of herself Loves the ripper you commissioned for her OGRYN GF "Da-Dah Commy-sar saids you are mah new offy-sir..." She looked super nervous when you "I uh... first met her I's thinks you're very pretty, can I be your uh... G-Gurlfren?" How could you say no? *you were afraid she might get upset and squish you" The hug she gave nearly killed you when you said yes "Mama always said 'You gots to protect the ones yah love lots' and I-I love you's a lot~" Beat a Tyranid Warrior to death... with another "NOBODY TOUSHES MAH OFFY-SAH!!!" Tyranid Proceeded to carry you a mile on her shoulder even though you were fine "H-Here yah go, Will occasionally give you pretty rocks she finds Always shares with you her arms (when she doesn't hold on to you) Snores like a tank Absolute teddy bear do yah like it?" You keep them all on a shelf in your quarters.
You can cross over to my Neutral Zone, human. Romulan GF Is that a cloaking device in your pants or are you just happy to see me? You think we should acquire a pet? How about a Klingon? An engagement ring? Oh, human. :33 *5 minutes later* IT'S A FAAAAAAAKE! I wasn't spying on you, don't be ridiculous! Now tell me who that girl you looked at yesterday when you were walking to the Turbolift was. I know you like beer but I only like Romulan ale spritzers so I got both. *makes your assassination look like a suicide so your family doesn't suffer any public shame*
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