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People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. C0 05 Charles Bukowski (via bittersweetsongs Wow bukowski so profound do you also bathe fully clothed you d-------. "Oohh isn't it funny that a person will eat when they're hungry but will duck if you throw an apple at their face"

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fulgur-caligo-custodis kurlyfryz Power move: Next time you go to the airport, bring a bottle of shampoo, but it's filled with yogurt. When they tell you that liquids aren't allowed Drink it Posted in r/madlads by u/ProbablyM_S reddit

lesbianshepard Jul 24 travelling next week for work. googled the nearest city and none of you are prepared to see what passes for the local style pizza. lesbianshepard Jul 24 this should be a crime lesbianshepard Jul 25 #someone needs to die for this #divorced dad type food #is the local chef a 12 year old latchkey kid? #as a new yorker im about to k J elf #abolish all prisons except one for these guys #that is a crime where I'm from #I'm anti regional food variation shaming but this is a crime man #mamma mia. #i took like a deep shuddering breath #i feel nauseous. #oh no they should be shot #literally the closest thing to anti-Italian racism the reviews are in: Pennsylvania must pay for its crimes

theaccidentfactory Follow I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby theaccidentfactory English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking s about the neighbor's son

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Someone find that clip so we can see that whole feeling of regret.

rvblocus SHE DIDN'T PUT A LID ON THE BLENDER AND I'M CRYING

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Like a Fucking Clown Scarf

August 30th, 2015 at 9:37PM deerdick asked: What if Rapunzel had super long hair when she was born? The doctor would be pulling like ten feet of slimy wet hair out. It'd be like a f------ clown's scarf. 32 notes #d--- answers a thing #deerdick

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I NEED AN ADU... Oh wait, I am an adult...

Today my 11 year old brother wanted us to go outside and play with his BB gun but my Dad wasn't around, so l was like "idk, maybe we shouldn't use it without adult supervision" and he just stared at me and I realized I am 20 l am an adult I am the adult supervision

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Agent 47's career beginnings

penceyprepofficial: when I was like 9 my neighbors asked me to watch their fish and cat while they went on vacation and I was like "lol k" and while they were gone tHE F------ FISH DIED so when they got home I apologized to the mom and she was just like "no need to apologize, turned the filter off so they would die because they are too much work. You did nothing wrong" and she gave me 20 bucks and that is the story of my first contracted murder First

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so I suck into his car

sifhappens: lheard my brother say he was going to dairy queen so l suck into his car and he has no idea I'm in here he asked his friend what he wanted and I popped up from the floor 'I was thinking about a milkshake' I have never heard two teenage boys scream louder

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The same can also be said if you remember someone who pissed you off long ago and now have an urge to punch someone in the face.

countingbooks c-parks urbancatfitters *has one uncomfortable interaction* *is f----- up for 3 days* more like 3 years more like the whole life Source: urbancatfitters 207,178 notes

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when you unsuspectingly see your best friend at the store

suctioning aciddd-angel: suctioning when you unsuspectingly see your best friend at the store why the f--- would this be my reaction You must not have a best friend

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Hell is other people. And Tumblr.

ST. CHRISTOPHER'S SOUTHEN BAPTIST CHURCH F YOU HAVE TUMBLR THEN YOU ARE GOING TO HELL lord-kitschener: esbiai thats fai f you have a tumblr then you're already there Reblogged 2 days ago from floating-head (originally from recovery-equals-happiness) 209,430 notes

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Tumblr in a nutshell

6omble Cocoune dic+ ds scremig the sitehas drug Porble s

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Fuck

moosekingofhell: homovikings: two words sixteen letters guaranteed to make any student cry thesis statements i just got nauseous and i've been out of school for three and a half years. Source: homovikings

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Kinda feels like that since parents usually overreact to those 2 words.

what i actually said: i forgot what my parents heard: i hate you and i am determined to fail at life, go to prison, and bring dishonor to this family. i care about nothing except my computer and tv shows and you can just go burn in hell for all i care. also i'm pregnant Source: arfakita

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"You can't separate the term "faggot" from homophobia."

theblackoaksyndicate+ Dear fellow gamers... You can't separate the term "f-----" from homophobia If you call me a f-----, I'm going to end you, because I don't know what your intentions are from there I don't care that YOU think it means "stupid" or "dumb", all I know is that the word "f-----" preceded a lot, ALOT, of people like me being brutally murdered for reason other than the gender they're attracted to If you're straight, you simply have no place telling me how to react the word f----- because you don't have to live with the history of that word and how it's been used to destroy people like me So, like I said before. If you call me a f-----, l'm going to iail, and you're going to the hospital Period. #w.homophobia #gamergate 57 notes

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Tumblr - It's all about what the situation is placed in

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People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. C0 05 Charles Bukowski (via bittersweetsongs Wow bukowski so profound do you also bathe fully clothed you d-------. "Oohh isn't it funny that a person will eat when they're hungry but will duck if you throw an apple at their face"

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