About

Oppenheimer Sex Scene Lady or ThatsNotLove refers to an anti-pornography TikTok influencer whose response to sex scenes in the film Oppenheimer led to much discussion and criticism following its release in August 2023. In the now-viral video, TikToker @thatsnotlove said that she arranged for her husband to close his eyes and look away during nude scenes in the film in order to avoid "triggering" her or himself.

Origin

Around August 3rd, 2023, anti-porn TikTok influencer @thatsnotlove posted a series of videos in which she answered questions from followers in her comments section. In one of these videos, she addressed a follower's concerns about watching Oppenheimer. She described planning ahead for watching the film with her husband, who agreed to close his eyes and buried his head into her shoulder during the sex scenes in order to not see them. The original post has since been deleted.^[1]

On August 20th, 2023, X user @fiImgirl shared the video with the caption "this actually makes me feel like I'm losing my mind," earning almost 50,000 likes over the course of one day (seen below).^[2]

this actually makes me feel like i’m losing my mind pic.twitter.com/gOZIbxz1mF

— bethany (@fiImgal) August 20, 2023

Spread

The Daily Mail published a story about the video on August 17th, 2023, when its spread and the controversy surrounding it was confined to TikTok.^[5] Other publications also wrote about the story in the following days.^[7]

On TikTok, comments around the video (which was deleted on the morning of August 21st) centered around whether the response to a sex scene in a film was justified and normal, as well as what the TikTok niche of @thatsnotlove calls the "anti corn movement."

The posting to X triggered a series of debates and discussions over the positions taken in the TikTok clip. For example, X user @jonathanmb32 pointed to the irony that the most disturbing part about a film depicting the atomic bomb seemed to be a naked woman (seen below, left) receiving over 45,000 likes in a day on August 20th.^[3] Meanwhile, X user @lsi_baehr pointed out how rapidly the internet had turned on the woman behind the video, stating they were concerned for her mental health (seen below, right) receiving over 70 likes in an hour on August 21st.^[4]

The viral TikTok also inspired parodies as it continued spreading online. For example, on August 20th, 2023, X user @kosherhotdogz posted a parody of the original video, but this time about watching the film Shrek 2 with a significant other. The video earned over 9,700 likes in less than 12 hours.^[6]

advice for watching shrek 2 with your husband https://t.co/Cc2CS73BRD pic.twitter.com/q3tCtQzatM

— Alex Friedman (@kosherhotdogz) August 20, 2023

Various Examples

External References