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Greentext Stories - Image Gallery Page 3

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Doctors hate anon for this one simple trick | /r/Greentext

File: d8og2uv-96b2cc0d-9281-4f3(.).jpg (39 KB, 640x818) fatties btfo Anonymous Eat only when hungry > Thin Literally this easy.

Anon hears screaming | /r/Greentext

Literally just happened >be me >college student >taking exam online at midnight because Chinese Sneeze >hear screaming >whatever someone's drunk 6 KB JPG >screaming continues >open door and look outside >some old dude harassing college kids from the street >ignore it >screaming continues >imthoroughlyannoyed.exe >open door >tell guy to shut up or I'm calling the cops >tells me to do it and that I'm bitch >whatever >call cops >tell them someone's screaming and raising hell and give location >see police cruiser and sheriff stroll past house minutes later >hear yelling >hear gunshots Don't bother me while I'm taking quizzes you f------ junkie

Anon is a Weeaboo | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/11/21(Wed)03:11:33 No.64927629 >generic wimpy anime protagonist becomes a God >OMG THIS ANIME IS SO DEEP AND MATURE JAPAN IS SO BASED 25 KB PNG

Anon fucks Gatorade bottle | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/04/18(Thu)17:51:26 No.781496673 >Be me >Taking to friend >Says he f----- a Gatorade bottle and it felt really good >Decide to try it out later that day >D--- doesn't fit 154 KB PNG >idea.jpeg >Stick soft c--- in bottle and watch p--- until it's hard >When I achieved about a half chub I realized I f----- up >Try to pull out c--- but it was too late >Bottle squeezing my d--- with the force of 10 Ben Shapiros >On the ground writhing in pain >Bottle acting like a super c--- ring and keeping my d--- hard for over 10 minutes >Bust a fat nut in the gatorade bottle >Finally get my d--- out about a minute later Overall l'd rate the experience a 7/10 would do again.

Anon is a hero | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Womanlet Revenge 10/17/17(Tue)20:20:28 No.40480576 >See constant threads about girls s------- on manlets on /r9k/ >Be 6ft 2in white guy >Be borderline sociopathic, barely have any empathy 53 KB PNG >Use Tinder and match with only really short girls >Exclusively seek out shorter girls (5ft 4in or below) >Talk to them and casually bring about short >if any of them talk s--- about manlets or say they're gross, I start pursuing them harder guys >Ask them out with the promise of sex >Take a small bottle of mustard water and hide it in my jacket >Go to the roastie w----- place >Make out or whatever and then right before we're about to f--- ask to be excused and go to the bathroom >down the mustard water >go back to see her >hold back the vomit >When their clothes come off I immediately start vomiting all over and spray it as much as I can >roastie is horrified >l tell them I find their shortness disgusting andI feel l'd be f------ a child >I leave telling them they shouldnt date tall guys and to stick to manlets I've successfully done this 10 times in the last 6 months. They always end up crying or freaking out and I j------- to that thought when I get home. I'm doing this for you my manlet brothers, its not your fault you didn't have the genetic lottery. F--- those roastie w-----. 73 Replies/ 21 Images View Thread

Anon has low self-esteem | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/11/21(Wed)10:58:26 No.860802555 give me advices /b/ros >be me >18 >skinny twink >virgin >never kissed a girl 38 KB JPG >l consider myself a 6/10 but a girl once said im good looking >everyone thinks im a good person to be with >ppl like to hang out with me and invite me even if im shy and I do nothing >1 girl was into me in elementary school >4 girls were into me in middle school >2 girls were into me in HS >my low esteem always made me realize it when it was too late >about to start uni in a few months >focused on getting gf this time how can I get rid of my low esteem and my inferiority complex? 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 08/11/21(Wed)11:30:13 No.860803552 >>860802555 (OP) # stop basing your worth on other peoples perception of you figure out why you hate yourself so much and change it or deal with it focusing on getting a girlfriend won't end well for you if you don't love yourself dumbass

Anon has never been outside | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/12/20(Tue)22:36:00 No.58122654 >go outside >see people with long hair >see people with t--- >see people wearing a dress >they're everywhere W-- guys I thought women were just a meme 280 KB PNG

Anon gets to third base | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/03/18(Fri)13:44:13 No.47258475 >be me >donate blood >get message week later >"Your blood has been put to use" >Track down the guy on Facebook >Message him >Really cool guy actually 259 KB JPG >Weeks later >Meet his new GF >"Dude I'm gonna get to third base tonight" >Bitch, that's my blood in your d--- >l'm the one getting to third base, not him >Technically f--- his girl See you later virgins EAU090829.jpg = (25 KB, 400x400) google yandex KOD Wal Anonymous 02/28/18(Wed)19:54:42 No.761398814 v >7€ >be me >have low blood count >go to hospital for blood transfusion >o_negativebloodmyguy.fortnite >get 2 units of blood >released next day >spend night with qt gf >have mind blowing consensual sex >realize my d--- was full of someone elses blood >mfw someone else basically f----- my gf >mfw I cucked myself

anon is a coomer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/02/21(Sat)20:00:42 No.61674162 1609512437158.png 467 KB PNG >try nofap >feel like I'm 14 again, constantly thinking about girls, actually give a s--- about what femanons have to say >go back to yesfap (i.e once a day when I wake up) >no horny, hate women again Why the hell would anyone do nofap?

Anon loves his Job | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/10/21(Tue)18:33:56 No.860779353 >new job >work at grocery store >have 2 managers >only ever seen one >restocking snack aisle >see 6'5" burly man in feminine clothing talking to employee >get back to breakroom after restocking >tell coworker about the tank in the store 212 KB JPG >tells me that's manager numero dos >ask why I've never seen him >am told he has "mental health days" >Ask him how often >he says wednesday to sunday This f----- is making $34k - $50k to sit on his ass what the f---

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