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Anon got his priorities straight | /r/Greentext


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Anon Thinks Turkey is Good for Travel | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/08/21(Sun)17:12:54 No.2072840 >cheap as f--- Co >sunny >attractive women >good food >no lockdowns, not hard to get in 50 KB JPG Why the f--- are you not in Turkey right now? 87 Replies / 6 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 08/08/21(Sun)17:12:54 No.2072840 >cheap as f--- Co >sunny >attractive women >good food >no lockdowns, not hard to get in 50 KB JPG Why the f--- are you not in Turkey right now? 87 Replies / 6 Images View Thread

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miles transcends the physical plane | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/14/21(Sat)17:17:18 No.2076401 >>2076276 # >Taliban busts into Miles' hotel >Miles is gone, having ascended to a higher plane of existence >they check around for clues about where he has gone >one of them searches the bathroom, lifts the toilet lid >they find a log larger than a football, impossible for any mere mortal to have passed through his colon >this is all that remains of Miles within our realm of existence
: Anonymous 08/14/21(Sat)17:17:18 No.2076401 >>2076276 # >Taliban busts into Miles' hotel >Miles is gone, having ascended to a higher plane of existence >they check around for clues about where he has gone >one of them searches the bathroom, lifts the toilet lid >they find a log larger than a football, impossible for any mere mortal to have passed through his colon >this is all that remains of Miles within our realm of existence

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Anon explains Joe Rogans guest folk stories | /r/Greentext


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Anon watches a youtube video | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/15/21(Sun)16:28:04 No.861112506 >be me >watching typical meme compilation on YouTube >a wild funny appeared >attempt to slap knee >miss and end up high fiving my testicles >mfw 38 KB JPG
: Anonymous 08/15/21(Sun)16:28:04 No.861112506 >be me >watching typical meme compilation on YouTube >a wild funny appeared >attempt to slap knee >miss and end up high fiving my testicles >mfw 38 KB JPG

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Anon is on the way to NEETdom | /r/Greentext

>be me >britbong >got ADHD symptoms but never fully tested >bored watching TV >ad for disabilities comes up >lady with ADHD comes up 6 KB JPG >w--.jpg >do some research >mfw ADHD is a disability in the UK >mfw when I can leave the NEET life and get free meth from the government I love this country
>be me >britbong >got ADHD symptoms but never fully tested >bored watching TV >ad for disabilities comes up >lady with ADHD comes up 6 KB JPG >w--.jpg >do some research >mfw ADHD is a disability in the UK >mfw when I can leave the NEET life and get free meth from the government I love this country

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Anon spends $10 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/05/18(Thu)08:02:15 No.44422418 >paid a h----- an extra $10 to shout "yamete onii- chan!!-" when i f----- her Best use of that $10 ever 88 KB JPG
: Anonymous 04/05/18(Thu)08:02:15 No.44422418 >paid a h----- an extra $10 to shout "yamete onii- chan!!-" when i f----- her Best use of that $10 ever 88 KB JPG

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Anon meets Michael. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/04/13(Wed)23:37:55 No.504275002 >go to school with large tard population, we import them >for incoming tards, teachers get the inside scoop >friend's mom is teacher, tells him 17 KB JPG to avoid the one named Michael >he wears a helmet at all times, and can only grunt and say his own name, like a Pokemon >one day, strolling through the hall I see the tard parade on their way back to class >we had those old school metal trashcans like they used in the WWF, pic related >out of nowhere Michael raises on above his helmeted head and chirps gleefully "Michael!" >wranglers try to get him to stop >he gets a twinkle in his eye >"Michael!" >he brings the trashcan down like the hammer of God on the head of the disabled kid in the wheelchair, whom we called Hot Wheels >Hot Wheels begins to chimp out in his chair as garbage rains down on the other tards who begin honking and wailing >Michael is restrained by 4 adults, all the while with an oblivious smile on his face
Anonymous 09/04/13(Wed)23:37:55 No.504275002 >go to school with large tard population, we import them >for incoming tards, teachers get the inside scoop >friend's mom is teacher, tells him 17 KB JPG to avoid the one named Michael >he wears a helmet at all times, and can only grunt and say his own name, like a Pokemon >one day, strolling through the hall I see the tard parade on their way back to class >we had those old school metal trashcans like they used in the WWF, pic related >out of nowhere Michael raises on above his helmeted head and chirps gleefully "Michael!" >wranglers try to get him to stop >he gets a twinkle in his eye >"Michael!" >he brings the trashcan down like the hammer of God on the head of the disabled kid in the wheelchair, whom we called Hot Wheels >Hot Wheels begins to chimp out in his chair as garbage rains down on the other tards who begin honking and wailing >Michael is restrained by 4 adults, all the while with an oblivious smile on his face

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Anon tries to save the situation | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/16/21(Mon)06:14:17 No.861136726 >be me >work with children, ages 7-10 >coworkers constantly tell me I do the best job out of everyone >love them, it's a lot of fun >when I talk to them I get down to their level to talk face to face, because they're 6 KB JPG small >one day one of their moms shows up >very short, must have been 5'0" or maybe even less >out of habit I get down to her level >she looks at me weird >l immediately realize and panic >pretend to untie and then tie my shoe again like an autist >her daughter didn't come back the next week or ever again
: Anonymous 08/16/21(Mon)06:14:17 No.861136726 >be me >work with children, ages 7-10 >coworkers constantly tell me I do the best job out of everyone >love them, it's a lot of fun >when I talk to them I get down to their level to talk face to face, because they're 6 KB JPG small >one day one of their moms shows up >very short, must have been 5'0" or maybe even less >out of habit I get down to her level >she looks at me weird >l immediately realize and panic >pretend to untie and then tie my shoe again like an autist >her daughter didn't come back the next week or ever again

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Anon's teacher is a scumbag | /r/Greentext

File: cunteacher.jpg (51 KB, 625x418) EVERYONE HAS THEIR HAND UP BUT YOU? Anonymous 08/16/21(Mon)03:20:24 No.861148362 >>981148459 >be me in middle school 12yo >be in last class of the day with a new teacher >start feeling hungry, dizzy, tired. >take out a dextrose tablet out of my pencil case >right as I put it in my mouth the teacher looks at me >teacher goes "anon you better not be eating in class" >I tell them have type 1 diabetes and I am just taking dextrose >"If you don't spit it out I'm failing you this year" >tell her I have a doctors note if she doesn't believe me >"spit it out" SIA MERI CALLS ON YOU ANYWAY >quickly chew the tablet and swallow it >she looks at me like I just called her slurs >"to the principal's office RIGHT NOW!" >go to principal and explain >he agrees with me and tells me the teacher probably didn't believe me >principal writes note to show to teacher I'm allowed to eat in class >go back to class and give teacher the paper >she just looks at it and motions her head in a "go sit down" way >class ends >"anon, you stay" >assume she wants to maybe apologize or something >"anon you have detention today" >excusemewtf.webp >"nobody eats anything in my class" >remind her again that I'm actually diabetic and that the principal (basically her f------ boss) has allowed me to eat >"no butts or you're staying tomorrow as well" >by this time I'm very angry >try to say something but she interrupts and tells me to sit down or detention for a week >sit down >"give me your candy as well" >tell her it's not candy and that I'm not giving anything to her >she grabs my pencil case and locks it in her desk >"I'm going to the teachers room and you're going to stay here and sit on your seat until I come back!" >bitch actually locks the classroom door >after like 10 minutes start feeling very dizzy again (being angry depletes sugars rapidly) >try to break open her desk >next thing I know is waking up in an ambulance with my mom and a nurse next to me >sugar crashed so hard I went into a coma >teacher got fired next day What was your "incredibly bitchy teacher who almost killed you in school" moment, /bl?
File: cunteacher.jpg (51 KB, 625x418) EVERYONE HAS THEIR HAND UP BUT YOU? Anonymous 08/16/21(Mon)03:20:24 No.861148362 >>981148459 >be me in middle school 12yo >be in last class of the day with a new teacher >start feeling hungry, dizzy, tired. >take out a dextrose tablet out of my pencil case >right as I put it in my mouth the teacher looks at me >teacher goes "anon you better not be eating in class" >I tell them have type 1 diabetes and I am just taking dextrose >"If you don't spit it out I'm failing you this year" >tell her I have a doctors note if she doesn't believe me >"spit it out" SIA MERI CALLS ON YOU ANYWAY >quickly chew the tablet and swallow it >she looks at me like I just called her slurs >"to the principal's office RIGHT NOW!" >go to principal and explain >he agrees with me and tells me the teacher probably didn't believe me >principal writes note to show to teacher I'm allowed to eat in class >go back to class and give teacher the paper >she just looks at it and motions her head in a "go sit down" way >class ends >"anon, you stay" >assume she wants to maybe apologize or something >"anon you have detention today" >excusemewtf.webp >"nobody eats anything in my class" >remind her again that I'm actually diabetic and that the principal (basically her f------ boss) has allowed me to eat >"no butts or you're staying tomorrow as well" >by this time I'm very angry >try to say something but she interrupts and tells me to sit down or detention for a week >sit down >"give me your candy as well" >tell her it's not candy and that I'm not giving anything to her >she grabs my pencil case and locks it in her desk >"I'm going to the teachers room and you're going to stay here and sit on your seat until I come back!" >bitch actually locks the classroom door >after like 10 minutes start feeling very dizzy again (being angry depletes sugars rapidly) >try to break open her desk >next thing I know is waking up in an ambulance with my mom and a nurse next to me >sugar crashed so hard I went into a coma >teacher got fired next day What was your "incredibly bitchy teacher who almost killed you in school" moment, /bl?

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