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Greentext Stories - Image Gallery Page 2

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/g/anon gets the last laugh | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 29 KB JPG Thanks for the free cooms, Sam! >>95784599 # >>95784754 # Anonymous 09/03/23(Sun)18:32:50 No.95784581 >Use $150 worth of GPT-4 on my own key because I'm a richfag >OpenAl bans me in the banwave >They never charged my card for the usage at the end of the month >>95784581 # Based??????? 09/03/23(Sun)18:34:01 No.95784599

Anon's tragedy on 9/11 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/03/23(Sun)08:04:04 No.189450479 >normally mom wouldn't let me watch Johnny Bravo because it was innappropriate >go home early on 9/11 >know it's gonna be on soon >mom is crying in the living room on the phone with grandma all day >go to the other tv, now's my chance >Bush is giving a speech; Johnny Bravo cancelled f--- terrorists and f--- Bush

Anon thinks Chinese people are magic | /r/Greentext

32 KB JPG >be me >eat at Chinese restaurant >order fried rice >get chopsticks instead of a fork >can use chopsticks to grab food somewhat decently >use it to eat rice >literally passes through every grain >not even any clumps for me to grab >Chinese guy at table far from me is also eating rice with chopsticks >picks up large amounts flawlessly and eats it >talk about this on /pol/ >say that Chinese people are magic >get banned for troll posts >mfw

Anon grows a super girlfriend. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Uhh...guys? 36 KB JPG 09/14/20(Mon)18:44:26 No.57433665 Recently I convinced my girlfriend to swallow me after oral, which of course is awesome. But something strange has happened...her deadlift and squat 1RM PRs have increased 21 and 17 percent respectively in the last 2 weeks. Now after our workouts she demands to suck my c---. Last night she even got me erect against my own will. I'm worried she grows stronger by the day, should I strike her down before it is too late? 22 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

Anon needs to play Red Alert again | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/29/23(Sat)17:56:05 No.645734574 3 * FI FR SHILFE PATR TIRE file.png 1.42 MB PNG How did they agree to do this for Red Alert 3?

Amy tells us a tale | /r/Greentext

File: 150507-news-amy-schumer.jpg (49 KB, 349x509) Anonymous 10/17/15 (Sat)14:22:14 No.646917109 > be me, Amy Schumer > get a crush on some guy who wouldn't touch me with a ten-foot pole > one day he drunk dials me > I go to his house > he's so wasted he literally cannot make eye contact with me > 1, fully sober, walk over to him and initiate sex > he is so drunk he can't even stay erect > he falls asleep on more than one occasion >I keep having sex with him > tell this story at a feminist gala > feminists praise me for literally r----- a guy > mfw the media doesn't even care > mfw I get to host Saturday Night Live > mfw I have the gall to condemn Bill Cosby for doing the same s--- I did

Anon gets fit | /r/Greentext

File: 165372467236.jpg (93 KB, 1200x1200) Treadpill Anonymous 09/04/23 (Mon)15:10:19 No.74622723 >>74622787 >>74622788 >be me >fat sack of s--- >one day decide i do not want to be a fat sack of s--- >get rid of my couch >buy a treadmill >place it in the living room >now whenever i want to watch TV, i have to go on the treadmill >start losing weight immediately it's just that easy

Anon's night | /r/Greentext

Anonymous L'OREAL TOTAL 59 KB JPG 12/07/18(Fri)19:13 >friday night >shower >shave beard >hair product >new jacket >new shoes >apply fragrance >say goodnight to parents >hide in the woods until 2am

Average wagie life | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 62 KB JPG 09/04/23 (Mon)19:07:47 No.74621096 >go to school >work >age >experience trauma and loss >die

Dadanon does some research | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Need to learn teen lingo G 08/25/23(Fri)01:10:32 No.904948497 download (3) (4).jpg 8 KB JPG hey guys I'm a dad who's been scrolling this site for around 10 years, need some help with my son's lingo >Son comes home from school >I'm watching some political videos >Son says "that is totally baste" >His friend comes over, they're playing video games and I overheard him say "that's baste as fk" >What does baste mean these days

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