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Anon Knows How the Martians Died | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: qUhuZOSO) 06/16/22(Thu)10:40:45 No.382562205 File: th_edit.jpg (90 KB, 745x462) 60 30 0 -30° -60° 180 2001 MANS ODYSSEY -120 0.2 -60* Th (ppm) 0.4 V1 PF 0.6 M 0 0.8 Department of Planetary Sciences Lunar and Planetary Laboratory G 180 >>382561593 (You) Pic related is thorium content in soil measured by Mars Odyssey. WHY THE F--- THERE IS A THORIUM HOTSPOT NEXT TO F------ PYRAMIDS ON THE BOTTOM OF THE FORMER SEA F------ find me natural process which does that. You can't. There isn't one. Only thing which makes sense is that somebody set off nuke(s) in the ocean to kill the inhabitants of Cydonia by fallout while keeping the buildings intact. Cydonia was never hit directly, all damage there is from erosion. We are not talking a war, we are talking a f------ planned genocide. These f------ psychos wanted us to know what happened. 2/2
Anonymous (ID: qUhuZOSO) 06/16/22(Thu)10:40:45 No.382562205 File: th_edit.jpg (90 KB, 745x462) 60 30 0 -30° -60° 180 2001 MANS ODYSSEY -120 0.2 -60* Th (ppm) 0.4 V1 PF 0.6 M 0 0.8 Department of Planetary Sciences Lunar and Planetary Laboratory G 180 >>382561593 (You) Pic related is thorium content in soil measured by Mars Odyssey. WHY THE F--- THERE IS A THORIUM HOTSPOT NEXT TO F------ PYRAMIDS ON THE BOTTOM OF THE FORMER SEA F------ find me natural process which does that. You can't. There isn't one. Only thing which makes sense is that somebody set off nuke(s) in the ocean to kill the inhabitants of Cydonia by fallout while keeping the buildings intact. Cydonia was never hit directly, all damage there is from erosion. We are not talking a war, we are talking a f------ planned genocide. These f------ psychos wanted us to know what happened. 2/2

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It is over for anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 64 KB GIF traveling >I had none 01/18/23(Wed)08:30:37 No.71870975 >be me >in college class >TA makes us do activities to get to know each other better >she has us show photos of prompts shes written on floor and to share it with someone >first photo asks for a picture of you >then she goes onto ask a photo of you with your friends 3 Replies >I dont have friends >my pictures are full of skyjacks and naked women Is it over for me anons View Thread
: Anonymous 64 KB GIF traveling >I had none 01/18/23(Wed)08:30:37 No.71870975 >be me >in college class >TA makes us do activities to get to know each other better >she has us show photos of prompts shes written on floor and to share it with someone >first photo asks for a picture of you >then she goes onto ask a photo of you with your friends 3 Replies >I dont have friends >my pictures are full of skyjacks and naked women Is it over for me anons View Thread

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Anon burgers a burger | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >oh, waitress! *snaps fingers* come here, my poppet, I've decided on what I shall dine upon today. >May I have the BEARDY MCBEARDMAN MEGA BEEFY QUADRUPLE BEEF BEER BACON N BOURBON BURGER WITH 3000 MONTH PINK HIMALAYAN SALT CAVE AGED CRUELTY FREE SLAVERY FREE NON GMO FARM TO TABLE CIGAR SMOKED GOUDA >Oh, and of COURSE! My apologies for not realizing that the hot sauce menu was a subset of the MAIN menu (albeit a separate pamphlet detailing the intricacies of each sauce, as well as pairing suggestions, would be a welcome addition (pass that along to your sauce monger)). I shall sample your in-house BEELZEBUTT'S 7,000,000 SCOVILLE HEMORRHOID HOLOCAUST NUCLEAR A--- LEAKAGE XXXXXX FECAL FURY SAUCE; and, my sweet, mayhaps a bottle of it to go? Though I am yet to taste it, I am sure that my buddies at the barcade - yes, a portmanteau of 'bar' and 'arcade, and YES, you can actually DRINK as you PLAY VIDEO GAMES, whatever will they think of next? - will be utterly TICKLED by the label your crew has concocted for that bottle! 97 KB JPG 01/16/23(Mon)22:38:50 No.18819869 *taps glass* >and another round of your hoppiest IPA, please! >>18819892 #
: Anonymous >oh, waitress! *snaps fingers* come here, my poppet, I've decided on what I shall dine upon today. >May I have the BEARDY MCBEARDMAN MEGA BEEFY QUADRUPLE BEEF BEER BACON N BOURBON BURGER WITH 3000 MONTH PINK HIMALAYAN SALT CAVE AGED CRUELTY FREE SLAVERY FREE NON GMO FARM TO TABLE CIGAR SMOKED GOUDA >Oh, and of COURSE! My apologies for not realizing that the hot sauce menu was a subset of the MAIN menu (albeit a separate pamphlet detailing the intricacies of each sauce, as well as pairing suggestions, would be a welcome addition (pass that along to your sauce monger)). I shall sample your in-house BEELZEBUTT'S 7,000,000 SCOVILLE HEMORRHOID HOLOCAUST NUCLEAR A--- LEAKAGE XXXXXX FECAL FURY SAUCE; and, my sweet, mayhaps a bottle of it to go? Though I am yet to taste it, I am sure that my buddies at the barcade - yes, a portmanteau of 'bar' and 'arcade, and YES, you can actually DRINK as you PLAY VIDEO GAMES, whatever will they think of next? - will be utterly TICKLED by the label your crew has concocted for that bottle! 97 KB JPG 01/16/23(Mon)22:38:50 No.18819869 *taps glass* >and another round of your hoppiest IPA, please! >>18819892 #

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Anon has a sister. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/18/23(Wed)19:58:13 No.71872320 >looked through my 15 year old sisters stuff while she was away because it's f------ hilarious >found a diary ASL >jackpot 55 KB PNG >its all dated and organized, and written with maximum precision which is very odd because everything she owns is filthy and her handwriting has always been a mess >lots of cringey stuff for the most part until about 3 months ago >she's extremely infatuated with this boy >the text about him get more and more unhinged the deeper I read >from simple "I hope he notices me today" to paragraphs about how she followed him home and stole his jacket while his family was away >Huh. So that's where that unfamiliar oversized jacket came from. >paragraphs and detailed images of what it'd be like to dissect him (she's an excellent artist which made it 1000x more creepy) >paragraph after paragraph about all the freaky sex she'd have with him, most of it ending in death I'm honestly f------ scared.
: Anonymous 01/18/23(Wed)19:58:13 No.71872320 >looked through my 15 year old sisters stuff while she was away because it's f------ hilarious >found a diary ASL >jackpot 55 KB PNG >its all dated and organized, and written with maximum precision which is very odd because everything she owns is filthy and her handwriting has always been a mess >lots of cringey stuff for the most part until about 3 months ago >she's extremely infatuated with this boy >the text about him get more and more unhinged the deeper I read >from simple "I hope he notices me today" to paragraphs about how she followed him home and stole his jacket while his family was away >Huh. So that's where that unfamiliar oversized jacket came from. >paragraphs and detailed images of what it'd be like to dissect him (she's an excellent artist which made it 1000x more creepy) >paragraph after paragraph about all the freaky sex she'd have with him, most of it ending in death I'm honestly f------ scared.

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Anon is Youtube man | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/18/23 (Wed)03:47:39 No.71869130 55 KB JPG >Hey guys, Charlie here >heres me explaining every minute detail of a 30 second clip on Twitter over the course of 10 minutes >here's the most milquetoast YouTuber or corporate drama you've ever heard >reviews thing people like: "it's good" >reviews thing people don't like: "it's bad" >all of this is funny because I use the words penis butt and fart in every sentence
Anonymous 01/18/23 (Wed)03:47:39 No.71869130 55 KB JPG >Hey guys, Charlie here >heres me explaining every minute detail of a 30 second clip on Twitter over the course of 10 minutes >here's the most milquetoast YouTuber or corporate drama you've ever heard >reviews thing people like: "it's good" >reviews thing people don't like: "it's bad" >all of this is funny because I use the words penis butt and fart in every sentence

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Anon does polish math | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: TrMqFEvJ 01/03/23(Tue)01:33:30 No.410639017 cja liczebności kobiet do mężczyzu w o un an... age prawdopodobieństwo, że losowo wybrany junior z ESSA dostąpi awansu zawodowego w najbliższym roku. 12. Zawodowy snajper ukraiński trafia ruskiego ,żołnierza" (czyli: oku- panta) ze skutecznością 90%. Obliczyć prawdopodobieństwo, że w 10 nieza- leżnych podejściach snajper wyeliminuje co najmniej 8 ruskich okupantów. W rachunkach wykorzystać odpowiedni warsztat zmiennych losowych. 99A218B7-7670-4836-B85E-DC0B56A60D47.jpg 58 KB JPG Meanwhile in Polish high schools >Professional Ukrainian sniper hits a Russian „,soldier" (meaning: invader) with a success rate of 90%. Calculate the probability that in 10 independent tries the sniper eliminates at least 8 Russian invaders. Use proper random variables in your calculations. holy kek >>410639175 # >>410639189 # >>410639206 # >>410639366 # >>410639428 # >>410639563 # >>410639594 # >>410639665 # >>410639671 # >>410639701 # >>410639721 #
: Anonymous (ID: TrMqFEvJ 01/03/23(Tue)01:33:30 No.410639017 cja liczebności kobiet do mężczyzu w o un an... age prawdopodobieństwo, że losowo wybrany junior z ESSA dostąpi awansu zawodowego w najbliższym roku. 12. Zawodowy snajper ukraiński trafia ruskiego ,żołnierza" (czyli: oku- panta) ze skutecznością 90%. Obliczyć prawdopodobieństwo, że w 10 nieza- leżnych podejściach snajper wyeliminuje co najmniej 8 ruskich okupantów. W rachunkach wykorzystać odpowiedni warsztat zmiennych losowych. 99A218B7-7670-4836-B85E-DC0B56A60D47.jpg 58 KB JPG Meanwhile in Polish high schools >Professional Ukrainian sniper hits a Russian „,soldier" (meaning: invader) with a success rate of 90%. Calculate the probability that in 10 independent tries the sniper eliminates at least 8 Russian invaders. Use proper random variables in your calculations. holy kek >>410639175 # >>410639189 # >>410639206 # >>410639366 # >>410639428 # >>410639563 # >>410639594 # >>410639665 # >>410639671 # >>410639701 # >>410639721 #

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Anon missed his opportunity | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 127 KB JPG Anonymous 01/18/23(Wed)01:30:11 >really like this girl that's 1 in a billion >>71871612 # No.71871598 >we get put in a group together >have my head down the entire time >make no advances >class ends >high school ends >feel the regret in my chest every time I think about it she's f------ chad rn 01/18/23(Wed)01:30:58 No.71871602
: Anonymous 127 KB JPG Anonymous 01/18/23(Wed)01:30:11 >really like this girl that's 1 in a billion >>71871612 # No.71871598 >we get put in a group together >have my head down the entire time >make no advances >class ends >high school ends >feel the regret in my chest every time I think about it she's f------ chad rn 01/18/23(Wed)01:30:58 No.71871602

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Anon "accidentally" raped his friend | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/17/23(Tue)18:59:47 No.24368210 >>24362959 >I think you can be a bitch sometimes? Yeah. It's happened a time or two. Not something I brag about, though. Old greentext: >"accidentally" r---- a friend of mine >she would join me and my wife for some MFF action >sometimes would stay with us for a couple of weeks >one time after much alcohol admits to r---/ravage fantasy >asks me to help her out >explain about safeword >wife is there and hears whole thing >3 days later, I make my move (early evening, no alcohol) >pull out c---, grab her back of head and shove her down >she resists at first then gives lackluster bj >act angry, throw her back onto the couch and rip her t-shirt and panties off >slap her a couple of times complaining about s----- b------- >her face is in shock, crying (c--- getting harder) >shove it in her vag, a little dry at first but don't care >she's still crying while I pound her >grab handy lube, apply it, then start pounding her in the ass >hurts her, more tears >wife is there, kisses her, comforts her >shove c--- back in vag and c-- my brains out >lay back, pull her into my arms to calm her down >she asks "Why did you do that to me?!" >"You asked me to" >wife reminds her of earlier discussion >girl says she's sorry she forgot >said she was still scared but happy it happened >relaxed MFF time later that night Basically I r---- a girl in front of/with my wife and everybody was happy in the end.
Anonymous 01/17/23(Tue)18:59:47 No.24368210 >>24362959 >I think you can be a bitch sometimes? Yeah. It's happened a time or two. Not something I brag about, though. Old greentext: >"accidentally" r---- a friend of mine >she would join me and my wife for some MFF action >sometimes would stay with us for a couple of weeks >one time after much alcohol admits to r---/ravage fantasy >asks me to help her out >explain about safeword >wife is there and hears whole thing >3 days later, I make my move (early evening, no alcohol) >pull out c---, grab her back of head and shove her down >she resists at first then gives lackluster bj >act angry, throw her back onto the couch and rip her t-shirt and panties off >slap her a couple of times complaining about s----- b------- >her face is in shock, crying (c--- getting harder) >shove it in her vag, a little dry at first but don't care >she's still crying while I pound her >grab handy lube, apply it, then start pounding her in the ass >hurts her, more tears >wife is there, kisses her, comforts her >shove c--- back in vag and c-- my brains out >lay back, pull her into my arms to calm her down >she asks "Why did you do that to me?!" >"You asked me to" >wife reminds her of earlier discussion >girl says she's sorry she forgot >said she was still scared but happy it happened >relaxed MFF time later that night Basically I r---- a girl in front of/with my wife and everybody was happy in the end.

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This greentext was written by a spider | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 923 KB JPG >cute >funny >friendly 08/19/21(Thu)12:58:03 No.65049060 >good mothers >funky dance moves >favorite food is mosquitos and termites >venom not dangerous >don't bite people >don't make irritating webs >easy to find why haven't you released an army of jumping spiders in your house
: Anonymous 923 KB JPG >cute >funny >friendly 08/19/21(Thu)12:58:03 No.65049060 >good mothers >funky dance moves >favorite food is mosquitos and termites >venom not dangerous >don't bite people >don't make irritating webs >easy to find why haven't you released an army of jumping spiders in your house

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Anon lost his master | /r/Greentext

No.179379603 File: dying-yoda-return-of-the-(...).jpg (171 KB, 1280x720) >>179374914 (OP). >me 20 6/10 nerd >her 8/10 cutie spanish girl >first and only people either of has ever done anything sexual with Anonymous 01/17/23(Tue)22:56:18 >be good friends for 6 month but both too awkward >be on Vanilla WOW JUST getting a tank for Sunken Temple >get a call from her telling me no one is home, NO ONE IS HOME >tell my group im about to lose my virginity >group goes wild wishes me luck >head over >both nervouse >throw on retuen of the jedi and we start awkwardly fooling around >put my penis in and look over >yoda and my virginty are gone
No.179379603 File: dying-yoda-return-of-the-(...).jpg (171 KB, 1280x720) >>179374914 (OP). >me 20 6/10 nerd >her 8/10 cutie spanish girl >first and only people either of has ever done anything sexual with Anonymous 01/17/23(Tue)22:56:18 >be good friends for 6 month but both too awkward >be on Vanilla WOW JUST getting a tank for Sunken Temple >get a call from her telling me no one is home, NO ONE IS HOME >tell my group im about to lose my virginity >group goes wild wishes me luck >head over >both nervouse >throw on retuen of the jedi and we start awkwardly fooling around >put my penis in and look over >yoda and my virginty are gone

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