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214) A lesson I learned in the hospital....when vou masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot. doctorcanon: cmcross No, you don't understand. This actually happens. We got a 16 year old boy on our unit once, because Pediatrics was full, and it's about 1 in the morning and al the nurses are at the nurses station having a break and we're all talking and having a laugh and then all of a sudden this kids heart monitor just goes CRAZY So we call the code and I grab the crash cart and about 6 of us just take off running down the hall and we bust in the room and this kid is just sitting there with his hand around his junk looking MORTIFIED. So we just sot of backed out of the room quietly, walked calmly to the stairwell, and had a total and complete hysterical breakdown It was the funniest s--- ever. Omigod so many nurses have told me stories like these

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