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[watching the Lion King] ME: I've never seen this before. WIFE: Oh dear, better get the tissues ready. ME: I hardly think I'm going to j------- to a bunch of lions Karen.

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Dear Anonymous Passerby, Don't worry, you're safe now! Your act of casual cruelty was successful. The complaint you lodged with the HOA was heard. They had me take down the small treefort that I built on this location with my sons during the pandemic. No longer will its presence offend your walk) past my house. Please enjoy your stroll free from the sound of my children's play and laughter. They are safely back inside now, watching television I'm sure. Enjoy the unobstructed view of my backyard. I will try to keep it up to code. Best, -Dave

Rylee @RyleeMoser FOR WHAT REASON DOES EVERY APARTMENT COMPLEX HAVE A DOG WEIGHT LIMIT OF 20 POUNDS? I can promise you my 90 pound golden retriever is a hell of a lot better behaved than Karen's 7 pound p------------ devil worshipping chihuahua

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