Uploaded by Eunice Tremble Jan 16, 2022 at 10:42AM EST
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![Authoritarian The Soomer The Elamite The Assyrian The Hittite The Egyptian priest The Akhenaten > Egypt stop this. I'm dead. You are only hurting >Hey Egypt! Egypt! Eeeegypt! >Thinks his War chariots are the >NO0000!!! > Boring version of persia, nobody actually knows who they are anymore. >Considered great by some historians to just because they babylon once (lol) You are alone, child. There is You can't make yourself by believing l'm still alive. Carry on our legacy instead! Remember to be as pedantic as possibile in counting every grain traded! only darkness for you, and only death for your people. These rients Nations are just the nning. I will command a egypt into a monotheist state! Nobody even knows Aten! Do you realize you returning egypt into a theocratic Police state?!!? best >won't shut up about having sacked babylon seem hip sacked and terrible army, and we >50/50 chance harch to a billion kingdoms. their king is f------ and goat Also be wary of. ill march until every light een extinguished. You are ig, child, but I am beyond insane >Great power, "Yes, let's sponsor a rebellion against Assyria,what could go wrong?" (a lot) Loses to Sea ngth. I am the end, and I e come for you. Yes. NO NO NOOO! PLS рeople DON'T LEAVE ME!!! The Persian The Boomer of Akkad The Philistinian The Israelite The Babylonian The New Kingdom > Based? Redpilled? GamerGate? >what if I make playground Pharaoh level laws,that any halfwit can create, the state law? >oh wow, they think me >Literally who? >HOW DARE YOU CLAIM THAT YOU ARE NATIVE! NATIVES!!! STOP WE ARE THE LOCALS >"F--- OFF, THIS IS MY LAND! >Feminism!? SJW!? Marxists!? >.w-- is a muh slim? > His Power keeps getting eroded by the priesthood after Old Kingdom Glory day >Lives in the WE WERE HERE FIRST!!! WE ARE Mountains >l'm a what!!? Friends > Has to marry his flat- chested sister to keep blood pure, Prefers big breasted northern women with count Dankula!!? GENOCIDING US HERE!!! THIS IS some great lawmaker >Most boring records in all of ancient history >Uknown even > EU bad!!!? OOo oo 0 AND JUSTYING IT OUR PROMISED to the medes Autocracy Bad!!? LAND THAT YHWH GAVE TO BOOK. YOU HAVE US, THE CHOSEN NO RIGHTS HERE!! PEOPLE! NOT YOU STUPID PA... >"Oh great Pharaoh, my master, pls give me gold" -every vassal >"Yes Honey, I will go to syria to fight again. - For the 17th Time UKIP?!?!? IN YOUR RACIST >Maybe we should tolerate each other guys? SJW cringe The Mede PROPAGANDA >The f--- you talking about? C'mon, we gets city destroyed and then rebuilt by the have an empire to assyrian >didn't even make > Has to wear the same clothing that his great(x24) Grandpa wore create! AND.. his world wonder |The Indus Valley Boomer The Scribe The Mitanni >Culture held the giving away of daughters in high prestige The Kushite The A---- >His religion is an allegory for his conquest of india over lesser men > Permanently confirms his heirs domit >related to the Scythian, eww > scanf( "%d ", number of grain, sheep, rye.) > Likes egypts culture, >Defeats the Assyrians, rules for barely 50 years. (The Ultimate Cuck) >Claims he came from the Misterious City of builds impressive Mohenjo-Daro. pyramids > Still called "Vile Kushite" in Egypt creating a caste >Used to Rule Yeah ok, grandpa. >I [insert ruler name], Great King, King of "Kings, King of Lands, King of the Universe... Nover Assyria >Claims that there was no war in his day nce by >only time of independece, >Used to... > Fell even >Says that everyone was equal and there was no class (b-------), l>Pyramids destroyed by an Italian for gold system favouring his decedents "who tf is Hitler!?"/ will become before the kurds later on bronze age .collapse... డ The Dorian The Wrangel Island Mammoth >still alive by 2000BC The Minoan GF The Aramean The EA-Nasir The Mycenean >Will invade the Mycenean >Gives you low quality copper Treats you and your messanger with contempt > Keeps all the complaint tablets at home to laugh at >Thought he was going to be >T--- out all the time > Trades her "goods" >After enslaving the population, His will be the only he will take their >Will wage constant warfare, engange in piracy and trade. Ithe new invader in the near east >Can't stop tooting >TOO0OT >oh f---, are those canoes? and become like all the time >Wants a society that values women epic to survive the period for a long time, even though it was passed down orally. the Kassites culture aswell. >Actually becomes the Assyrian king's Punching bag and is the subject of assyrian victory steeles Reject Modernity, Return to Mammoth? and to show >Will cuck you with the ultra-conservative Mycenean Chud, >whenever we think of the Iliad or of ancient greece, we'll be the people rose up in revolt thinking of him, to kill them. dominance. > Kings were such assholes, that even in an age of kings Alashyian The Luwian (Troy) > Yes QUEEN! Of course you can lIslander cheat on your husband The Royal Artist The Cimmerian > Litteraly who? The Phrygian > Rich, but not as rich as>MONEY MONEY >Literally created money >Currency was on gold standard >Croesus was rich The Lydian >ls forced to carve historical or religious scenes, with gods and kings. Would starve or be flayed if he did otherwise > Very rich in the Lydian > Tries to attack copper >ls an european e invader, forever know Money as the stereotype of decadent easterners +Literally Created >Annoys even the Hittites Assyria: gets >Will let -Literally Created >Has to depict the King Much larger and Amanlier than everyone (else massacred. anyone use it Money >Nobody even >Will let >Will get conquered >"Haha, Free'd slave" by the Persian due >Exists only to be replaced by the Scythians knows them anyone use her to Camels.. City Destroyed x 9 >"The Assyrians are invading again!" >Would Much rather >Sea People paint a Neo-Expressionist postminimalist painting NOOO00 The Germanic The Shardana The Scythian The Urartu Warlord > Actually Attacks Assyria Instead of Hiding in his city The Akkadian Merchant The Phoenician Wizard/Priest >Does nothing of >Gets low quality copper ingots note before or >Very rich from trade (hahaha what a loser) >Literally Called the Horde from >Gets insulted by Ea-Nasir >Literally only achievement is creating a weird ass alphabet that will >Consumes Shrooms who knows where >*Brings Forth the after >Has to travel >Wanders the land Dark Ages* > Highest point of Armenian Civilization through war zones (Ununmanda) >Wreck an Assyrian king, together with his whole army > But when >practices human NURAGVE >State thinks he never take on. he does, She will end (the World >ls in constant is a smuggler IS MY CITY sacrifice > Rich only due to purple seashells >Gets conquered by anybody >in times of crisis, finds minors hot.. state of >Hat Calendar >Owes Ea-Nasir >UUUUUAAAUU Warfare a mina of silver UUUUUUHHHH AAAHUUUUU >this happens >Wife & Daughter >has to deal >Is trying to find the hobbits with the every 3000 would rather be Cimmerian years... with Ea-Nasir Libertarian Right Left](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/280/874/00c.jpg "Mesopotamia wojaks")
