Know Your Meme
CHECK IN/OUT PROCEDURES: WIFI Code and Password in Binder on Coffee Table (If WIFI is slow please restart router) Guests to provide paper products. Guests are given 2 toilet paper rolls per toilet & 1 paper towel roll and will be responsible for addition paper products during their stay. DO NOT FLUSH: Feminine Products, Paper Towels, Wet Wipes, or Baby Wipes Down Toilet. DO NOT WASH SAND DOWN DRAIN, USE FOOT BATH TO KEEP SAND OUT OF HOUSE. DO NOT HANG ANYTHING ON CEILING FANS. CHECK OUT PROCEDURES/TIME: 10:00 AM Leave bedding on beds. Do not Strip Please. Start one load of towels in washer. All dishes in dishwasher and started (Dishwashing detergent capsules are located under sink) NEAT AND TIDY. Please be respectful, cleanup and leave house as you found it. Furniture, furnishings and items used in same place as when guest(s) arrive. All trash and rubbish placed in outside black bins. Recyclables, glass, paper, plastic and aluminum beverage containers in Blue Bin. Scrub food from BBQ Wash Off Beach Toys and Beach Equipment Outside Close and lock all windows and doors. Turn off all lights, heaters and fans. Keys: Please leave keys on the Kitchen table or counter and lock doors upon departure. If Lock box is present please leave keys in lockbox. Please check drawers, closets, under beds, hooks behind doors and behind furniture. There is a $50.00 service fee for returning items left behind (this is in addition to shipping charges.) If you would like to leave unused food for the housekeeping staff, please have it bagged and left inside refrigerator or on counter. Also please leave condiments for next guests instead of throwing in garbage. DO YOU HAVE YOUR CHARGERS? RULES: No parties, excessive noise, or irresponsible activity. $300.00 fine if complaint by neighbor. Management may elect to terminate tenancy resulting in IMMEDIATE EVICTION with NO REFUND Quiet Hours Start at 10PM) Late Check Out past 10:00AM- $50.00 Fine If TVs are not switched back to existing channel for Cable/Amazon FireStick- $25.00/TV Fine If it is determined you have smoked inside - $150.00 Fine Also $3 for each c-------- found on premises of property. If there is evidence of a pet inside or onsite will result in immediate eviction with NO refund and loss of Security Deposit.

Help! I already forgot what station the tv was on when I checked in. FML | /r/FuckYouKaren


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Dear Anonymous Passerby, Don't worry, you're safe now! Your act of casual cruelty was successful. The complaint you lodged with the HOA was heard. They had me take down the small treefort that I built on this location with my sons during the pandemic. No longer will its presence offend your walk) past my house. Please enjoy your stroll free from the sound of my children's play and laughter. They are safely back inside now, watching television I'm sure. Enjoy the unobstructed view of my backyard. I will try to keep it up to code. Best, -Dave
Rylee @RyleeMoser FOR WHAT REASON DOES EVERY APARTMENT COMPLEX HAVE A DOG WEIGHT LIMIT OF 20 POUNDS? I can promise you my 90 pound golden retriever is a hell of a lot better behaved than Karen's 7 pound p------------ devil worshipping chihuahua
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