Bro I'm literally just a really handsome man

Notes:

I (mid-20s, female) have a problem. I've only lurked here before but you guys might be the only ones who even know what I'm talking about. Basically for the last two weeks I've only been able to masturbate to Sam Hyde. I've been depressed and have become more and more reclusive. I've been working from home as much as possible rather than going into the office (I work at a tech company so as long as I have my laptop I can work from anywhere). Work has been slow, so during most of my time I've been binging all of Sam's content. I knew of him for years but never really cared too much until recently for some reason, and now I feel like I'm starting to fall in love with him. Is that insane? The friends I do talk to are worried because I won't shut up about it. I've had BFs (and GFs) before and I get invited to go out to clubs and bars but I always cancel. All I wanna do is stay inside and watch Sam. His laugh enchants me and I think he's really cute. I made him my desktop background and my phone background. I dream sometimes that we're dating and when I wake up I'm really sad.

My last 2 relationships were with women and I thought maybe I was just gay and would never be attracted to men again until I got into Sam's vids. Now he's the only thing that gets me going. I have a very specific and weird fantasy I think about a lot where I roleplay Sam's mommy and bring him tendies or whatever else he wants while he plays games and stuffs his face with junkfood. I guess you could also consider me to be into feedism because I really get off on feeding guys. My last bf was 400 pounds and all my friends thought it was really weird because I'm not fat. But Sam wouldn't need to be 400 pounds--he's sexy at any size and I like skinny guys too. If he called me mommy I would melt.

I'm actually working on a fan project that I might post here at some point and I really hope he likes it if he ever sees it. Sorry, this got long, I just needed to get this off my chest. Thanks if u read!