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Nazi Germany: We'll invade the Soviet Union no problem Also Nazi Germany:

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My parents: How come you never socialize with the family? Me: *sits with family* Me: *gets insulted by entire family* Goodbye everyone. I will remember you all in therapy

ME: Hello, Nadia. 'Sup, Hot Wheels. Write that down, write that down!

me, going into a public restroom at 7 AM and seeing a sparkly clean toilet with blue water:

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YOU NEED TO GET AROUND 8 HOURS OF SLEEP, RIGHT? YUP cottom dantification MEDICAL RESEARCH AND YOU'RE GOING TO BED AT 2 A.M. RIGHT? 00 YUP SO TO GET ALL YOUR SLEEP, YOU SHOULD WAKE UP AT 10 A.M. RIGHT? THAT MAKES SENSE TO ME THEN WAKE UP AT 10 A.M. WAKES UP AT 6 A.M. imgflip.com

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Steal his look Saint Laurent suede jeans $2,690 LV Neo Inventeur belt $760

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when Im supposed to get up and not be late for work ulanolette7598 On weekends and days off knowing I don't need to be anywhere and can sleep in

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y'all wanna talk about range...

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My calculator after I ask it what 7+5 is on a test

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SpongeBob SquarePants - Too bad the Germans didn't have Giant rocks. The pioneers used to drive those babies for miles | /r/BikiniBottomTwitter

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Nazi Germany: We'll invade the Soviet Union no problem Also Nazi Germany:

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