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Me leaving Area 51 with a microwave that heats the food, not the bowl

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My history teacher when I ask him where is the chapter on the Raid of Area 51 because I want to learn more about our nation's history: F What in the heaven's name are you talking about?

They don't know we are going to raid Area 51

Me explaining to my new Area 51 alien that Coke Žero is NOT the same as Diet Coke

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