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Twitter / X - Image Gallery Page 2

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I get it

Henpecked Hal @Henpecked Hal Last night my seven year old asked to go to bed about 20 minutes before her normal bedtime. "Are you sleepy?" I asked. She said, "I'm not tired, I'm just tired of being awake," and brother, I felt those words in my bones.

Terrible timing

Like... okay...

Anosognosiogenesis @pookleblinky Every cop show: d this serial killer is crafty, very smart and sneaky Every true crime podcast: despite dozens of complaints from neighbors, it took over a year for police to investigate the source of the foul odor

Woohoo

Geoff Norcott ☑ @Geoff Norcott Follow Massive away win for the little fella. X ERYMAN GLADIATOR 2 PADDINGTON 1:37 PM Dec 2, 2024 15 3 PG i

Worst nightmare

Sosa @ihysosa imagine u gettin kidnapped with a stuffy nose and they tape your mouth

True

Kris P. Bacon @KrisWolfheart kids today are missing out of the pre-streaming era, where your childhood was at least partially defined by some semi-obscure movie your family just happened to own on tape and you watched several dozen times

That's just wrong

big wet pig @bigwetpig I work at Domino's and sometimes when people put instructions for different ingredients to be on the left/right I put the left ingredients on the right and the right ingredients on the left

They'll never know

makayla @makaylathinks i once worked with someone who told customers "sorry, it's my first day!" any time they messed up. for 2 years straight . 2:46 PM 19 May 21 Twitter for iPhone

Thanks, mom

Calla Wahlquist @callapilla My parents are replacing their coffee machine, which is 7 years old. Me: that's not that old, I have sheets older than that. Mother: well perhaps your sheets aren't getting as much action as our coffee machine. I'm going to need an ambulance.

How do you live like this?

Saucy Spice @trilleti I've never actually heard guys introduce themselves, how do y'all find out each other's names? Young Sesame Chicken @loccdawgg We usually just wait until we hear somebody else say it

Did this happen?

Anjali Oberoi @bringitanj So I'm driving and I notice the guy behind me is cute so I'm checking him out in my rear view mirror and HE DEADA NUMBER?? AIRDROPS ME HIS towarc 50 feet Turn right onto AirDrop would like to Share a note. Decline 0.5 miles Turn left onto Accept Google Maps oo0 18:12 35%) Notes To the girl staring at me from the really old car... hope this is u 781

This is true

Teya @tey_an Gen Z will drink one medium caramel latte, not eat a single thing till 4 pm, verbally abuse a racist, crack a joke about their mental health and pick up a tear gas canister with their bare hands, but get nervous when they have to call to make a doctors appointment. 12:59 6/8/20 Twitter for iPhone 33.6K Retweets 168K Likes

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