"i lik the bred"

Confirmed 305,678

Part of a series on Poetry. [View Related Entries]

My naym is floof I alk wif fren. They are the Nine and I make ten. The Dark Lord sez, "Fetch me the Ringr But we can't find the heckin' thing.

My naym is snek My body long My hed is smol But jaw is stronk And wen it time To get me fed l open wide l monch the bred

必 If you're awake between 3 AM and 6 AM you're appropriating lycanthrope culture and you need to go to sleep and check your privilege asgardreid aviewfrommercury This is blatant vampire erasure. asgardreid Go write a sad poem about it aviewfrommercury My name is Vlad and wen its nite or wen the wolves art pohsting s---- and all discourse haf gon to dogs i stay up late i clik reblog

anvall the men ljaf gonto 6e stae up Caie fif the tyes

philffs/or @iwant3.14 on instagranm my nayme is cow i eat the haye and after dat i want tu playe i find my fren the farmers pet and wit my tung i lik the cat

annie-thyme Follow my name is goat and wen i'm free or wen i'm sik of graveetee upon the rock meself exalt - i stand up proud i lik the salt.

View All 23 Images

About

"i lik the bred" is a series of short poems about a domesticated cow written by British author Sam Garland,^[8] better known by his Reddit handle Poem_for_your_sprog,^[9] in response to a storytime thread about the worst code violations that public health inspectors have seen while on the job. Due to the abundance of absurdism and misspellings of words in the text, Garland's poem has been widely celebrated and parodied on Reddit and Tumblr since October 2016.

Origin

On October 25th, 2016, a now-deactivated Redditor began a new storytime post on /r/AskReddit, asking the "health inspectors of Reddit" to share their stories about the worst code violations they have seen on the job. In response to the thread, Redditor Chamale^[1] told a story about his step father working as a baker in an authentic 18th century recreation of a New French fortress. After convincing the health inspector that the kitchen was as health-conscious as possible without sacrificing the integrity of the 18th-century recreation, the inspector spotted a cow roaming around the fortress and licking all the bread. Redditor poem_for_your_sprog, whose gimmick is to respond to comments by turning their content into poems, wrote a poem^[2] in response to the story (shown below). The comment gained over 15,000 points (90% upvoted) prior to being archived.

my name is Cow,
and wen its nite,
or wen the moon
is shiyning brite,
and all the men
haf gon to bed -
i stay up late.
i lik the bred.

Spread

Garland's poem became an instant hit on /r/poem_for_your_sprog^[3], a fan-made subreddit devoted to his poems launched in December 2013, as well as among other alt-lit and poetry-related circles on Reddit and Tumblr. On the day Garland posted the poem on Reddit, Tumblr user phantomrose96^[5] posted a screenshot of the poem, which gained more than 127,000 notes within three months.

↑ Chamale 6403 points 12 hours ago My stepdad used to be a baker in an authentic recreation of an 18th century New French fortress. Because they sell bread to the public, the health inspector came by, and she was ripping into my stepdad for violations like the stonework walls, the doorless entranceways, or the lack of a mosquito zapper. He pointed out that they were following the highest standards except for things that would destroy the authenticity of this 18th-century bakery. The health inspector relented and agreed to give him a pass after verifying the food storage area was secure. They went to the shed, which was a doorless building attached to the bakery As the health inspector went in, there happened to be an escaped cow licking all of the loaves. My stepdad could only say, "Honestly, this never happens." They passed the health inspection dr: Health inspector witnesses escaped farm animal licking all the bread in a bakery, passes health inspection anyway permalink embed save report give gold reply [-) Poem-for-your sprog 6409 points 10 hours ago @x4 my name is Cow, and wen its nite, or wen the moon is shiyning brite, and all the men haf gon to bed i stay up late. i lik the bred ↑

In the following months, ironic appreciation for Garland's poem continued to gain momentum on Tumblr, inspiring many parodies, artworks and other works of tribute.^[6] On November 13th, 2016, Soundcloud artist Hindulaatti uploaded a song^[4] with lyrics borrowed from various poems by Redditor poem_for_your_sprog, including "i lik the bred," sung in doggo speak.

On January 17th, 2017, Tumblr user Sashayed^[7] posted one of the most popular parodies of the original poem in which the cow licks cats instead of bread, accruing more than 17,000 notes in less than 48 hours.