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Greentext Stories - Image Gallery Page 3

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Anon gets exposed | /r/Greentext

Anon gets great advice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/28/21(Wed)22:42:31 No.859861328 >Dated 6 girls in high school >Never introduced any of them to my parents >Now I think my dad thinks i've never had a girlfriend before >l'm like 75% he thinks i'm gay and is trying to get me to say it >Any time he sees a girl like over 7 KB JPG the age of 14 he'll point her out to me >l know he's trying to be nice or whatever but it's really uncomfortable : Anonymous 07/28/21(Wed)22:43:50 No.859861393 >>859861328 (OP)_# Say you have been saving yourself for him, then try to take his pants off.

Anon has autism | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/28/21(Wed)22:59:25 No.859862148 >be me >in line for cashier >notice guy has bag full of these squid plushies >want to know where he got them so I can get one for my gf >say "excuse me sir" as politely as I can 76 KB JPG >completely ignored I hate people so f------ much

Anon has a fat penis | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/28/21(Wed)20:18:55 No.859844301 >Be me a 19 yO sophomore and a kissless touchless virgin > Never got laid always had fantasies and dreams thru movies and literature >Always had great deal of respect towards females, courtesy to growing 156 KB JPG in a household of single mother. >Ffw to the girl I met in library >Peak liberal arts student, Netflix casting worthy. >Me a 6/7 hardly can have a shot with this 9/10 >Bleh worth of try anyway >We exchanged numbers decided to meet later that night >Dinner went well, having my hopes high that finally if not a gf maybe a fem friend at least >Life is truly turning out for good >We take long walks across campus >Talking about hometowns, nostalgia, movies and hobbies and anything and everything basically Hands cling >She initiates in holding hand subtly while conversation is being carried out almost naturally >Omg it's happening finally, like they display in movies, I am in my rom com afterall However, the moment she touched my hand, I popped a fat boner >Boner isn't obvious since I'm wearing a tight jeans and even though it is who cares soon it will be bang- O-clock >She recieves a call from her roommate >She has to leave now >She mentions how great time she had , looking forward to meeting me more and s--- >l mumbles something similar in response >She starts hugging as she is soon going to leave BONER IS MOST STRONGEST THAN EVER >No matter how hard I tried to held back, she felt that peepee pretty obviously >She looked at me right in the eye with absolute disgust >Sighs ew, slaps me and yelled pervert as she retreat her path back to dorm >Mfw my c--- blocked me

Anon has identity crisis | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: (KHOSUHDB Pro tip : don't be a mutt 07/29/21(Thu)02:01:25 No.331879536 >be me >half Ashkenazi Jewish and half Indian >Israeli law says that I'm Jewish since my mom's Jewish >okaynoproblem.jpg >Fast forward 10 years >no one at my school accepts me 30 KB JPG as a Jew because I look too Indian >fast forward 21 years >visit India >father's family does not accept me because I'm not a Brahmin (anymore) and apparently I'm untouchable because my mom's not a Brahmin >MFW I've severe identity crisis Should I unironically kms at this point? Also, pro tip bros: Don't be a mutt : Anonymous (ID: W5ICih2w 07/29/21(Thu)02:03:25 No.331879767 >>331879536 (OP)_# move to america and change your name to juan gonzales.

Anon hates Kant | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/30/18(Mon)08:13:52 No.11077762 >Emmanuel Kant: Drank a *lot* of coffee. When he didn't have a cup for a while he became distraught and would cry "I am drowning!" This was the sign for his 274 KB JPG servants to bring him a new cup of coffee molto pronto. When he saw it arriving he would cry "Land! My dear friends, I see land!!" I want to bully him. What a f------ dork. Doesnt help that his moral theory is terrible.

Anon is a game dev | /r/Greentext

>make successful indie game >take tons of money in donations from fans >promise that big update is coming soon >say that theres a small problem with update thatll be fixed in a week 149 KB JPG >week passes >change story and say the update only comes out when your site is the first result when google searching the game >it happens, still no update >change story again >now theres multiple problems that randomly showed up and need to be fixed >months pass >hype around game quickly dying >complain on Twitter about being stressed >be NinjaMuffin99, creator of Friday Night Funkin >pic unrelated

Quality is not an act, it is a habit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/28/21(Wed)14:06:02 No.64745063 >have the library of alexandria in my disposal called the internet >can learn anything i want in the comfort of my home with just a few clicks >literally the only period in the history of humanity that this much 17 KB JPG information is possible and available to me >decides to spend time browsing f------ /r9k/ and cooming i guess i got whatevers coming to me

Elderly abuse | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/28/21(Wed)08:27:24 No.64742334 >hey son, where's our grandkids? >Your mother and I are disappointed in you for the 50th f------ time >Why can't you stop watching those Vietnamese cartoons? 97 KB JPG >Whats it called? Anime? >Why did you go and buy a sex doll >Why didn't you just talk to Kelly or Becky from down the street like how I met your mother, Claudia?

Anon unlocks a personality | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/28/21(Wed)05:14:30 No.24650357 >>24650455 >watch good movie >find cool character >internalize his being >new personality unlocked works with fiction books also

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