Does Master Chief's Suit Jack Him Off?

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TRUTH DOES NOT FEAR INVESTIGATION Benjamin Giraud Does The Master Chief's Suit Actually Jerk Him Off? www UNSC TICE OF NAVAL INTELLIGENC UNSC

4 year old me giving Dora wrong directions 11 year old me wishing "Bad Morning" to my teacher 32 year old me posting online that Chief's armor jacks him off

if master chief's suit jerks him off, then samus aran's suit should also jerk her off gurlukovich It's equality. ccreisz Samus doesn't need the power suit to jerk her off because Samus can get laid. hauntedbutch 25,936 notes Mar 12th, 2018

may may homosexual may @maysbian ... Replying to @imperatrixrhea and @softgothoutlaw "master chief's suit does not jack him off". LONE RESOLE GIF ALT 9:54 AM · May 13, 2022 · Twitter for iPhone

the tangent THE MASTER CHIEF'S SUIT DOES NOT JACK HIM OFF

DreamcastGuy @DreamcastGuy •.. Halo Infinite's campaign is really fun thus far. Kinda shocked they confirmed that Master Chief's suit does in fact jack him off but I am here for the lore. 4:47 PM · Dec 8, 2021 · Twitter Web App

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About

Does Master Chief's Suit Jack Him Off? refers to a viral discussion and a Halo community meme started by a joke statement made by Twitter user @dril and supported with hoax evidence by iFunny user revolver. Despite having been confirmed as a hoax, the statement that Master Chief's MJOLNIR armor suit automatically jacks him off became a subject of memes and a part of Halo fanon in 2017 and subsequent years.

Origin

On May 11th, 2017, Twitter^[1] gimmick account @dril wrote about having a gripe with the "Master Chief x Cortana" trope, writing that if one reads the Halo novels, one would discover that Chief's armor automatically sexually stimulates him. The tweet received over 6,500 retweets and 19,000 likes in five years (shown below).

wint @dril my main issue with "master chief f---- cortana" is if you read the halo novels youd know the space suit automatically jacks master chief off 3:52 PM · May 11, 2017 · Twitter Web Client

On May 12th, 2017, iFunny^[2] user and Halo fan revolver (currently Halo) shared @dril's post, writing that he was going to find the page confirming @dril's statement in the 2001 novel Halo: The Fall of Reach (shown below, left). Later on the same day, revolver posted^[3] a doctored screenshot of a page from the novel, edited to support @dril's tweet. The post (shown below, right), gained over 1,500 smiles in five years.

127 Eric Nylund time to show off the MJOLNIR design. Halsey stepped into the circle and turned to address the Spartan-II Program's benefactors. As she did, a holographic diagram of the MJOLNIR armor was displayed to her left, as the same files were transferred to the benefactors' PDAS. "This MJOLNIR combat armor is quite possibly the most critical advancement in our program," she began, "It will serve as a lifeline to our Spartans. It increases their already enhanced agility, strength, and reflexes. The outer casing is an enhanced titanium alloy, and the undersuit is an advanced flex-suit capable of applying Bio-foam whenever nec-" One of the benfactors cut her off, "Am I seeing this right?" She looked up from her PDA and quoted the text, "The groin region packs a sexual stimulant, designed to reduce combat stress and-" "Yes, it does, but we will be discussing inquiries on the MJÓLNIR armor on a later date, this is merely a prese- Halo: Fall of Reach

Spread

Later on May 12th, 2017, revolver^[4] made another post in which he admitted to faking the page as too many users believed the hoax. The post (shown below) received over 200 smiles on iFunny^[4] in five years.

THESE ARE FAKE YOU GULLIBLE M------------ wint @dril my main issue with "master chief f---- cortana" is if you read the halo novels youd know the space suit automatically jacks master chief off 5/11/17, 12:52 PM THIS ISN'T REAL time to show off the MJOLNIR design. Halsey stepped into the circle and turned to address the Spartan-II Program's benefactors. As she did, a holographic diagram of the MJOLNIR armor was displayed to her left, as the same files were transferred to the benefactors' PDAS. "This MJOLNIR combat armor is quite possibly the most critical advancement in our program,' she began, "It will serve as a lifeline to our Spartans. increases their already enhanced agility, strength, and reflexes, The outer casing is an enhanced titanium alloy, and the undersuit is an advanced flex-suit capable of applying Bio-foam whenever nec-" One of the benfactors cut her off, "Am I seeing this right?" She looked up from her PDA and quoted the text, "The groin region packs a sexual stimulant, designed to reduce combat stress and-" "Yes, it does, but we will be discussing inquiries on the MJOLNIR armor on a later date, this is merely a prese- Halo: Fall of Reach I've failed as a Halo account if 500+ people actually thought Cortana jacks off Chief in his suit...and judging by those comments many many people did had to ruin the joke it went on too long

On March 12th, 2018, Tumblr^[5] user gurlukovich made a post referencing the joke, writing that Samus Aran's suit should also jerk her off, with Tumblr user ccreisz replying that she wouldn't need that because, unlike Master Chief, she can get laid. The exchange gained over 25,900 likes and reblogs in four years (shown below).

On September 3rd, 2018, Kotaku^[6] posted an article titled "No, Master Chief's Suit Does Not Jerk Him Off" that explained the story behind the hoax. A tweet^[7] linking the article received over 840 retweets and 3,200 likes in four years (shown below).

Kotaku ... @Kotaku No, Master Chief's suit does not jerk him off. bit.ly/2PyUd2z 2:38 PM · Sep 3, 2018 · SocialFlow

In the following years, the hoax statement remained a prevalent subject of jokes in the Halo community, seeing increased use in the months surrounding the release of the 2021 video game Halo Infinite and the premiere of the 2022 TV adaptation of the Paramount+ series.